Dog Training - How to stop Barking

I mentioned in this post that the number one reason people call me to train their dogs is from house training issues. The #2 reason they call - "How do I get my dog to stop barking?"

Though each situation is different, the same factors often apply to a dog that barks to the point of really annoying its owner. Those factors include:
*Lack of Exercise
*Lack of Discipline
*Too Much Affection
*Feelings of Being "Pent Up" - Not Leaving the Yard Often Enough.

If you can do the exact opposite of the things listed above, you will likely dramatically decrease not only barking, but other pesky issues like hyper-activity, obsession, and whining.

Steps to Quiet Your Barker

Step 1 - EXERCISE
Draining energy from any dog will naturally result in the dog having less energy to do unwanted behaviors, such as barking. However, the way you exercise your dog is very important. A game of fetch or chase in the yard is nice - but it usually involves no real discipline. Instead of games, learn to walk your dog where he is at a heel or following behind you. Please - AVOID RETRACTABLE LEASHES. These are my worst nightmare when dealing with dogs. A good walk involves the dog being focused on the owner as the leader. This drains physical and mental energy and puts the dog in the right mind-set to be obedient in other areas of life.

If you have a super energetic dog, use tools like Dog Backpacks to help you drain their energy and give them a sense of purpose. (Their 'job' is the carry the backpack and its contents. It works!)

Once you master the walk (having the dog walk beside you) then you could even try things like roller blades or bikes to help you move at a pace that your energetic dog will love! Another bonus - when you are faster than they are, it blows their mind! Your speed increases your ranking within the pack.

Leaving your yard for exercise is wonderful for your dog's mental state. Just because you have a super large yard, that doesn't mean it's enough for your dog. Even if you lived in a mansion, would you be content to never leave home?

Step 2 - DISCIPLINE

Discipline within a dog pack is quite simple. It's often calm, quiet, and shocking to humans to see dogs properly discipline each other. The silent closed-mouth, intense stares and the low growls can often be totally unnoticed by us, we simply see the last step - the bite. It often looks like an attack. Growling, mouths open, one dog typically crying out in fear. It ends with one dog the victor - pinning the other to the ground. Amazingly, when it's an act of discipline, there will be no blood. It wasn't an attack - it was a necessary lesson for the lower ranked pack member.

How do we apply this to our dogs? Well, unless you want to actually grab a mouth-full of fur to mimic their natural discipline (and, I don't really recommend that...) then simply use your hand as a pseudo mouth. The goal is not to hurt your dog, but to shock and awe them. The first time you use this they will likely immediately snap out of whatever activity they're doing - from obsessing over birds outside to barking and whining because they heard a car door shut in the driveway.

First you warn - "Hey, quiet!" If they don't respond - you bite. A quick touch, but not a hit, to the neck or hindquarters works amazingly well. No pain, no frustration, and they get it. One rule for this to work - you MUST be calm. Dogs simply do not resond to frustrated, excited, too soft, or too stern energy. They crave balance and only become unbalanced because of us. As Cesar Milan said in a past episode of The Dog Whisperer,

"Humans are the only animals that naturally have stress and anxiety. We then create that for our dogs.. it's unnatural to them. I mean, have you ever gone into the woods and seen an anxious bear?"

Step 3 - Stop the Barking Before it Starts

You probably know what triggers your dogs barking episodes, so use that to your advantage. If hearing a car door shut outside sends him into hysteria (as it commonly does for dogs) then wait for that opportunity to discipline them.

If noise triggers them to run to doors and windows and frantically bark - then first you must get between them and the window or door and make them move away. Simply get your leadership skills together and walk towards them, using your hand to point them back. If they ignore, a gentle "bite" will likely get their attention - them repeat the command, "back."

Show them where they should go when they hear the noises outside. Place them away from the door, and stay there with them until they become CALM. If they are still obsessively looking at the door, they've not finished the exercise. Patience and consistency is the name of the game. If they wine, bark, or anything you disapprove of from their waiting area, IMMEDIATELY correct them with a verbal warning. "No.." "Shh.." "Stop.." Keep your cool.

Step 4 - DON'T OVERPRAISE

When your dog finally submits and becomes calm, that is not the time to say "good girl" or "that's great" or anything of the sort. Why? Speaking to them, especially praising them, feeds them energy. The goal is to drain energy. Dogs do not need verbal affection.. ever. That's for us. Do you see dogs patting each other on the back or speaking to each other in high-pitched tones to say "good job"? Nahh... they sense the energy from each other. They know when the pack leader is proud of them. Same goes for their human pack leaders. Simply share calm, proud, happy energy with them... see how they respond!

If your dog just won't stop the yapping, it might be a good idea to contact a dog trainer in your area. There are numerous methods that can be used to stop barking in a gentle way - it is definitely worth seeking help.

If you are in southern Arkansas, you can contact me at caninecorrections@gmail.com.

Curtis Vance - GUILTY

Our beloved news anchor, Anne Pressly was horribly  murdered last year, and today we celebrate a conviction of the perpetrator. You can read about that here.

This post isn't to rehash the horridness of this crime. I was inspired to post about this because of all of the amazing things people were calling into radio stations to say about Anne. I personally did not know her, but I've yet to hear even one negative remark about her as both a professional and as a friend and person.

She was outwardly stunning... and obviously just as gorgeous in her soul. It was so touching to hear the outpouring of love and support to her memory and to her family as they still grieve their loss.

It's times like these that I stop and think about what my own legacy is. How will people remember me when I die? Of course I hope to live to be 140 years old, but even if I died today - what would people remember? I don't think this to be morbid, rather to inspire myself to always seek God for what I should do each day. I know that if I follow him - I'll be doing the right thing. Wouldn't it be AMAZING to be remembered for nothing other than being an amazing Christian? Not for the "works" you do on earth, but for the spiritual connection you had with your Father?

I think of people that I've loved that have passed and the way I remember them. From my aunt that passed at just 39 years of age that I loved (and still love) so dearly... to my grandmother that passed shortly before that.. to my husband's grandmother that passed several months ago. I can recall so many wonderful things about each of them. Isn't it funny how in death someone almost immediately  morphs into a perfect being in your mind. All wrong they ever did can just disappear in your grief. Have you ever been to a funeral where someone stood up and said,

"Well, he got what he deserved and the world's a better place without his crummy attitude. Rest in peace friend."

Hopefully not.

I suppose a sad truth is that we can really search to find something good in anyone once they've left this earth... why can't we do that while they're still here? What would our cities look like if every single person just went out each day with one goal: Find good in everyone! Can you imagine the love, support, and encouragement that would occur? Wow.. it would change everything! What if all parents did that with their children? Teachers with their students? Husbands with their wives?

What would happen?

Celeb Moms

When I think of celebrity moms like Julia Roberts and Angelina Jolie, one of my first thoughts is,

"Man... how on earth do they look that good after babies.. much less twins! I hate her..."

I rarely give much thought to the trials that would be involved in raising children totally in the public eye. My bloggy friend over at The (Un)Experienced Mom had a great post about Katie Holmes and her daughter Suri.. and this news report.

I suddenly had the thought,
"Wow... what if people followed me around constantly just waiting to snap a video or pictures of my kids freaking out... and me freaking out in response?"

I mean.. seriously.. can you imagine?! I had to laugh about what would be plastered all over magazines at check-out lines and videos on You Tube if I were famous.

"Mandy breastfeeds 17 month old in public WITHOUT a blanket!!"

"Moss caught taking kids to school in her PJs!"

"Is husband's police job too stressful for the children?"

"What's REALLY happening to all of those dogs?"

"Two-year-old's tantrum in Wal-Mart captures Mandy's true stress - is husband's job to blame?!"

"Moss's 5-year old son proclaims to his classmates - "There is no Santa" - resulting in hysteria."

"Claiming to eat organic foods - Mandy's seen taking kids to McDonald's!"

"Moss claims to practice attachment parenting - but we caught this!"

Oh geez.. the list would go on and on! If every parenting trial or mistake I ever made was broadcasted for the world to see, it would be really hard to take. Thinking of the spin each different news (if you can call it news) channel would put on it.. that's really scary!

My kids would be dressed in amazing clothes and I'd have a home gym and personal trainer.. but the clothes, fame, money, and even totally flat stomach still wouldn't stop a toddler from having a screaming fit in the worst possible arena. It's good to know that even celebrities deal with this stuff!

Dr's Appointment Update

Well, the appointment lasted FOREVER. Two hours in the waiting room and another two hours spent with the doctor. Yes... you can probably guess that two hours spent with your doctor equals that all is not well.

Some of you probably aren't aware that we had quite the struggle conceiving our third child. Surgery, medication.. and lots and lots of prayers finally resulted in our totally healthy blessing, Samuel. Praise God! The reason I was infertile is because of a pesky little condition known as PCOS. Once I delivered Sam I had no problems from the cysts for almost two whole years! I had almost convinced myself that I was a freak of nature and had magically been cured.

Then, about six months ago the pain began again. Fast forward to today - the pain is almost unbearable at times. The best way to describe PCOS pain is that it feels like you have something huge in your entire lower abdominal cavity that isn't supposed to be there.. and it's pressing on everything. It often makes me feel as though I'm getting a UTI just from all of the pressure. Clothes don't fit because of the swelling, exercise becomes impossible because of pain. It really interferes with your daily life.

I spent a few minutes explaining my returning symptoms with my doctor and he ordered an ultrasound to see what he could see. I was shocked at the results. Both ovaries are already covered in cysts, and I'm not even to the mid-way point of my cycle.. which is typically when they are the most severe.

When we were trying to conceive, my ultrasounds always showed cysts on one ovary or the other.. but not on both at the same time. Lovely. I got sent home with a free sample of Seasonique (birth control pills) and orders to start taking them next month and report back if I am unable to tolerate them so we can go to the next treatment option. (which is an insulin dug - Metformin.)

Before the ultrasound I told the doctor that if we could determine that just one ovary was causing all of the trouble that I would jump at the chance to let him just go in and remove it. Unfortunately,  neither of them are functioning properly so.. that's out of the question. If the birth control pills don't work, we'll be doing another lap surgery to try to see if anything else is underlying that needs to be addressed. He would have liked to go ahead and do that.. but I always want to start with the less treatment necessary first and work my way up if I have to. With the 8 viles of blood they took to test for EVERYTHING... if something else needs to be done I'm sure we'll know soon.

I'm praying hard that the Seasonique works and I don't have to do anything further. It's frustrating to have to take birth control and not need it as birth control. My body is its own natural birth control. And, may I make a quick God plug here? I just want people to realize that his plans are ALWAYS so perfect even when they seem insane. Had we not had Madison so young, and Carter also unplanned so young... we likely would have missed our chance at having children. Or, we might have only had one. I never would have expected to be battling infertility starting at age 23... and pretty much be completely unable to ovulate on my own by age 26. I love it when God's plan comes full circle and you have that "Ahh.. now I see" moment. Full of thanks and praise today! He is so good... and so great.

Next on the agenda.. this Friday I have to have a breast ultrasound due to some findings at my breast exam. Never had to do something like this, but in all honesty I feel fine about it. I'm not worried at all. I just sense that everything is fine. My only real concern is how this pap result will come back. I just 'really' don't want to go to the next step if it doesn't come back clean. But, compared to so many others and what they battle each day, it's still small beans. It's always good to keep your troubles in perspective.

I'm just very thankful that no matter what any of the tests show, that I have the comfort of knowing that God is with me. He has me and he always has. Even in the absolute worst case scenarios - he is still in control. Not me, not my body, not doctors, not lab results - HE is. If he can create heaven and earth, the ocean and land, the animals and all people, then I know he surely can handle whatever life throws my way.

Doctor's Appointments with Toddlers in Tow

Don't be fooled.. this face is trouble

I am such a lucky girl. I get to visit the OB/GYN today for another exam... hooray. I am even luckier because I'm taking the two year old with me... oh joy. I probably could have asked several different people to keep him, and they would have, but with his current state-of-two-ness I just decided to lessen the trauma on us both and take him with me and pray for a miraculously fast visit.

Each time I go to the doctor with the kids I can't help but wonder if I'm the only parent that thinks it should be mandatory for EVERY doctors office to be set up with a complete jungle-gym. For the first 20 minutes of waiting, I can usually keep the little one entertained with books, food, and watching videos of himself on my cell phone. After that, the wiggles kick in and he wants to roam. And jump. And run. And tantrum because he can't run and jump. You would think that nurses would have mercy on those of us suffering, and making everyone else in the waiting room suffer, and slide us to the top of the list of those to be seen - but no. I suppose they must be fair. The only relief to be found is if there happens to be a kind-hearted mom in there as well that assures me that she too has a kid that acts like a kid. Of course, I tend to be stuck for hours with people that simply mumble under their breath about how I should "control my child" or give ugly stares from behind their magazines. As if I'M enjoying myself here? Have YOU ever gone out for hours with a toddler and they couldn't do anything?

Couple this with my stress about the actual appointment. Ugh...

I had a cervical cancer scare about a year ago, had the "bad cells" biopsied, and have had to go back every few months for repeat paps to see what happens. So far, the repeat tests have all been clean, Praise God! However, some weird symptoms that I had when I found out I had the abnormal cells are currently presenting again. I'm hoping it's just a coincidence and means nothing. Time will tell.

So, as you sit wherever you are, possibly having an equally as stressful day at work or home, please say a quick prayer on my behalf and on the behalf of my two year old. That he and I both come home healthy and happy.

How to Increase Your Blog Traffic - Today!

Since I am a bit brain-dead today due to boarding 4 dogs (one being an incredibly cute 7 week old puppy that has to go out to potty every 20 minutes on the nose) and having the kids home from school over the past two days - I am going to do a really straight foward, totally non-witty, hope you get some good from this, type of post.

One of the biggest questions I see in Blog Land is "How do you increase your readership?" I was asking myself this very question two months ago. I decided to really give Monetizing my blog a good shot, and the only way to make this work is by vastly expanding who visits my insane ramblings each day.

This is not such a hard feat if you have a website devoted to one thing or another. If you are selling something, a marketing wiz, or something that has succeeded in making serious cash blogging - then people will search for you. If you're like me, and most bloggers, you're a little random. I blog about life, kids, work, dogs, politics, news, fitness, health... whew! Where's the market for THAT blog, hu?

If you're a fellow Mommy Blogger and are looking for a way to get more people to regularly visit, then get ready for some linky love. Here are some of my new favorite websites to help drastically increase your page hits, visits, and regular readers quickly.

1. Blog Carnival - Joining up with blog carnivals are a great way to get more people to come and visit. I've actually found some REALLY amazing blogs that I now follow by searching for specific topics that interest me via Blog Carnival. Make sure to pay special attention to when the next addition is about to launch before you submit any posts to blog carnivals. If it's blank.. skip it and find another carnival that's being updated more regularly. Submitting great writing to a dead carnival does nothing for you.

2. 5 Minutes 4 Moms - Whether you're a business blogger or a mommy blogger, you will almost definitely benefit from this site. I've only been there for a couple of weeks but LOVE it. Great source of friendship, fellow bloggers, and people that have succeeded and are more than willing to give tips. Also found a couple of awesome blogs that I now follow here.

3. Blog Frog - super cool site. Lots of great bloggers that you can link up with. When you comment on someone's blog that has blogfrog, it will also link your website on their mainpage.. it can really boost your readership.

4. Link Referral - Just started this.. totally didn't believe it would work - IT DOES. 100% free. You can choose to upgrade and pay to increase your ratings on their website, and that in turn gets more people to read your blog, but I've not done that and have had about 10-20 people a day visit from Link Referral. The more you do on their site (RE: visiting other people's websites and rating them) the more your ratings increase. The more they increase, the more people you'll see. Truly, started seeing results from this on day 1.

5. Search Engine Optimize - SEO is all the rage in the writing world. If you can't write an article that naturally flows and is packed with words that Google, Yahoo, and all of those other search engines seek out every minute of every day - you'll never get work. Why? Publishers that head up online publications need people to find them. Especially if they're an up and coming company. Same holds true for your blog.

You may write the most beautiful, funny, or informative post - and it won't matter a bit if people can't read it. The basis of SEO is simple. Ask yourself, "How would I search for this topic on a search engine?"

Sometimes simply creating a great SEO title for your posts is all it takes. It works for me! I typically avoid witty, cute, or artistic titles to my posts for this very reason. I want more people to read it - so I try to make it easy to find. According to my stats, tons of folks are finding me on Google - so it does work! Give it a try!

6. Build Relationships with Bloggers - Visiting other people's blogs is great, but if you never give them any comment love, a relationship simply won't develop. A very simple way to increase your blog traffic is to find blogs you honestly enjoy, and comment away. Their readers will notice your remarks, and well written comments often lead to well written blogs. (I've found some of my favorite bloggers via their comments on my blog or on blogs I visit.) One rule - never comment and expect something in return. It will just lead to frustration and burn-out. Hence the part about finding a blog you actually REALLY like.

7. Find Blogs like Yours - Aside from The Blog Frog, 5 Minutes for Moms, Link Referall, and Blog  Carnival, another great place to find blogs is Technorati.com. Just try it out... you'll be hooked.

8. Regular Posting - The more often you post, the more you're site will be searched by those great search engines. Also, posting regularly keeps your readers interested. Optimally, you'll be putting up new content 5 or 6 days a week.

I've been following these links and these rules for about a solid month. Since I started, I've almost tripled the hits on my blog a day, and the time people are spending on my blog has also dramatically increased. These steps really do work! Whether you just want to share your information with more people, or want to draw more people in for effective monetization - give these sites a try. Report back! Let me know if they also work for you.

Have your own links to share that have helped you? Drop some link love in the comments!

Today's Woman

In today's times, we women are expected to be know-it-all's, do-it-all's, and don't-need-no-man-all's...


Can I confess something? I am that woman. That woman as in, the woman that feminists just hate. That woman that makes far-left, "God is a woman", women cringe. Oh yes... that's me!

"What makes this true?" You ask. Well, there is a plethora of events and mannerisms I could divulge here.

For one, I'm afraid of bugs. It takes one hearty battle cry to squish even the smallest of crawly things. The big ones? Don't even ask! I have truly asked my 5 year old son to kill spiders that make me scream.

"Honey, that shoe's too small.. grab Daddy's boot. Yes, that one. Okay, now you've got to hit him HARD so he doesn't jump or run away. You're such a big boy! You're so brave!" I scream from the top of the kitchen table. Hey, I'm raising MEN here, aren't I? And, yes, my 8-year old daughter is beside me on the table, learning how to be a real girl.

Secondly, I don't want to be dirty. I'm a tip-toe through the mud, "Get your grubby hands off of my linen skirt", "No, I don't want to sit on the ground... I'll stand," type of gal. I don't mind getting gritty for appropriate times, such as jogging with dogs or a planned outing with the kids - but never spring it one me. I am not spontaneous when I'm in my new kitten heels.

Me having a "You're messing up my hair!" moment.

I don't take out the trash, I don't do anything that requires hammers, nails, or screws. I could definitely hang pictures - but I'd rather just show my husband where they go and let him handle it. I do "need my man."

Putting bait on hooks and touching fish are gross. I WILL scream if the crickets jump on me or near me. I'd rather be pool-side than in a lake. Just sayin'... I'll lay out and catch some rays while you catch supper. Suits me fine.

I like bubble baths, candles, lotions, and long walks on the beach. (at least in my mind...) I can hold a screaming baby, cook supper, and help my kids with homework all at the same time... Oh yes, I am woman. Hear me roar.

I can earn a paycheck and still respect my husband as an awesome provider. I can negotiate with the best of them, have an opinion about EVERYTHING, and have a say in all things and still know that God has given my man the true authority in our home. (I know.. a lot of women hate that sentence...) I can fall on my face and thank God for my Christian husband that rules his home with gentleness and love and respect.

I'm Pro-Life AND Pro-Women's rights... ponder that thought if you will.

I cry at sad movies.. and happy movies. I hide behind my man during scary ones and threaten that I'll divorce him if he tries to jump out and scare me once it's over.

I sleep with a nightlight and when my husband's gone at night, my German Shepherd fills in as protector. Seriously.. I need someone.

I love to meet the girls for lunch, gab about fashion and kids, and then lace up my battle boots to go wrangle a 100 pound aggressive dog that grown men are afraid of. I am woman.

I may not be what feminists think I should be. I may not be what your typical homemaker thinks I should be, but this is me. I love staying home, I love going to work. I love being independant and I love being totally dependant - it depends on the day. I love the having the ability to change my mind... constantly. I LOVE being a woman!

idea inspired after reading a hilarious post by Shannon.

Dog Training - House Breaking

God has blessed me so very much. I have one of the coolest jobs in the world. I get to spend my time with amazing people that love, love, LOVE their dogs. They allow me to keep their dogs while they are away, and to come make house calls to fix any behavioral problems that crop up. From big, huge, mean dogs to itty-bitty, hyper-active, yapping dogs... I've had the chance to deal with them all!

I've had a few requests over the past few months to compile some simple dog training basics into a post. I love to write, but writing about dog training can be difficult for me. I'm so used to showing people what do to, that I've not had much opportunity to write it so that people can read what to do. Here's my best shot at it!

Dog Training 101 - Simple Solutions to Common Behavioral Issues

Issue #1 - House Training

Dogs going potty in the house is right up there on the list of reasons I gain new clients each month. New emails with "How to house train this puppy?!" in the subject line come rolling in often. Though each dog is different and may require tweaking of any training techniques, this is my general method of house training dogs - of all ages!

Tools Required - Crate, Leash, TIME AND PATIENCE

This method of house training is called Crate Training, and it is highly effective for most dogs and puppies. I will disclose that I do not recommend serious crate training for dogs until 12 weeks. Though it's good to introduce a crate early, as a place of peace and rest for a puppy. Not as punishment or confinement.

Crate training is quite simple, though it does take a lot of time and patience, depending upon the age, temperament, and energy level of your dog. The general idea is the dog is in her crate when you cannot 100% supervise her. Once you get the dog out, she is taken immediately outside to a designated "potty zone." (leash may be required to keep puppy in the zone) Once she potties, she gets tons of praise, then brought back inside to roam freely. If your dog is a puppy, then this "roaming" time should be fairly brief. Puppies can use the bathroom SEVERAL times each hour. Watch for the classic "I need to potty signs" like walking with her nose constantly to the ground - without showing signs of tracking an object. If you see this behavior, call her to you and have her follow you back outside to the potty zone. When you need to move on with your day, puppy goes back into the crate until you can watch her again. I never recommend puppies be left in a crate longer than one-two hours at a time, with at least 30 minutes to an hour of time out to play in between.

If you have an older dog (age 1+) then house training "should" be more simple. A crate can still be necessary at first, and you would expect an adult dog to hold urine much longer than a puppy - only needing to potty every two hours or so.

Many times people with older dogs call me claiming their 5year old 'baby' is still not house trained. This is rarely what is actually going on. Typically, adult dogs that still potty in the house after years of attempted house breaking are simply exhibiting dominant behaviors and are marking their territory. This cannot be solved with crate training, as the dog will likely potty outside, only to come in and directly pee in the floor. (more to come on that issue in the future.)

Even with consistent crate training, it is likely that your dog or puppy will slip up and have an accident inside. How should you correct accidents in the house?

Rule 1 for Correcting Your Dog - If you didn't see it happen, you cannot scold the dog.

I know, frustrating, isn't it? Dog's have memories of about 5 seconds, so if you find poo in the corner - and you didn't see the offense occur, you might as well get onto your spouse for doing it as opposed to the dog... they'll both understand why you're upset with them on about the same level.

Rule 2 for Correcting Your Dog - Have a consistent "no" word.

When you see Fido about to lift his leg on your plants, having a word that he's accustomed to hearing when he's in trouble will be helpful to stop the behavior immediately. Any word will work just fine. "Hey!" "No!" "Stop!" Whatever you can use in any situation, whether he's watering your ferns or tearing up the trash. One exception - do not use the dog's name during scolding. We want our dogs to come when they hear their names and have positive associations with being called... not thinking they're about to get a paper to the rear.

Rule 3 - Hitting Does Not Help

Dog discipline is actually very simple. In a dog pack - the pack leader has a very simple two-step procedure to disciplining members.

1. Growl
2. Bite

Keep the same rules.

1. Verbal Command/Warning
2. Immediate Consequence

Instead of swatting your dog (and I know that's so tempting!) take a lesson from Cesar Millan and bite him. No, not with your mouth... just create a faux mouth with your hand. Small dogs just require a touch with two fingers. After seeing the Dog Whisperer and reading tons of books and doing online studies, I now teach this same method to my clients. It is, by far, the most effective discipline technique I have ever used.

So, if you see little Princess squatting on the rug, the response would be

1. "No!"
2. A consequence of some kind. For potty accidents I typically simply pick them up and place them outside in the potty zone. Rubbing their noses in the soiled carpet doesn't help them understand the problem.

Your dog will have indoor accidents, and this is where the tools Time and Patience come into play. Just like with potty training a toddler, they just don't typically get it over night. The younger they are, the longer it may take.

Word of Caution - Trying to crate train a very young puppy can back-fire tremendously. Very young puppies have just come from a place where their mother cleaned up after them in the "den." They will have little reason to not potty in the crate at first. If they begin crate training by using the bathroom in the crate very often, they will simply associate the crate with a place to potty - and not their den. As the puppy grows a bit older, he will naturally avoid using the bathroom in his bed. Dogs always avoid going potty where they sleep and where they eat if it is at all possible. This is another reason you cannot effectively crate train a puppy if you will be leaving him in the crate for hours on end. It is simply physically impossible for puppies to hold it for hours and hours at a time all day and all night.

If you find yourself having what you feel is an excessively hard time with house training, there may be other issues at hand such as a dominant puppy or health issues. In times like these I highly advise seeking help from a vet or a trainer. If you are in Arkansas, feel free to email me at caninecorrections@gmail.com if you feel you need some one-on-one time.

I will try to have a weekly Dog Training Tip post. I hope it proves helpful for some of you!

What to Really Expect After You Have a Baby - Days 1 - 3

After posting just a bit of my own experiences with the ups and downs (and the really downs of living beside the potty) of my own pregnancies, I thought I'd follow that up with my experiences with those post partum days.

When I was pregnant, I honestly gave very little thought to how I would feel post-delivery. I worried constantly about the actual delivery, about breastfeeding, and about keeping a 7 pound ball of mush alive with only my husband here to help. Those things were so consuming to me that it just didn't seem like it would be that big of a deal recovering from childbirth. Enter - surprise C-Section!

I think most people can sort of imagine what it would feel like to have a C-Section... I mean, how pleasant can it really be to have your stomach cut open and a human being pulled out of it? The aftermath is expected to be at least a bit painful. But, what about those crazy things that you had no clue you would experience after having a baby? Let's talk about what to expect AFTER expecting.

Though my experiences were all C-Sections, having never tried for a VBAC (vagainal birth after Csection), I can assure you that a lot of the post-pregnancy symptoms I experienced will ring true no matter how the baby made its way from womb to arms.

Day 1 - Delivery Day

Immediately following the birth of my babies, I got to see them, snuggle them, kiss them, rub their heads.. cry at the sight of them - all from the operating table. I was so busy meeting my little ones that I didn't even care what was going on down on the other end. I kept pushing the thoughts of them shoving everything back in and sewing my body back together out of my mind. I mean.... gross.

Hours later I had gotten to nurse for the first time, and was still feeling awesome. Totally numb the entire day thanks to the epidural. No pain... lovely! Peice of cake!

Main symptoms include exhaustion... exhaustion... exhaustion. Cannot. Keep. Eyes. Open.

Nurses keep coming in to "check on my incision" and to see how much urine I'm putting out via the clear bag hanging on the side of the bed. Lovely. Nothing screams "welcome guests!" like a bag of pee, right? I always worried that somehow the cathetar would slip and I'd wind up peeing in the bed. Now, that would be crummy. Never happened, just so you pregnant people don't have to have the same worry in the future.

Lunch and Supper time come and I cannot make myself eat anything. No appetite at all with the first two babies.. the third one was the first that I did want to eat by supper.

Nurses bothering the crap out of me making me do breathing exercising, check my temp, blood pressure... everything. "Hey lady.. could you NOT jab around where I was just cracked open? Thanks!" All night they come in..every two hours to examine me and baby. Annoying.. but necessary. (quick thank you to all nurses.. seriously... you are awesome and make or break hospital experiences! Loved my nurses! Gotta bond quickly with someone looking at your entire body in its worse possible state.)

Day 2 - Epidural Out

Right after lunch was the magic hour in which the mean doctor would order my good drugs to be removed. Within 20 minutes the pain would set in. First just soreness. Then, pain. Horrible pain with my first csection - almost but not horrible pain with the second and third. Thankfully, repeat csections tend to be MUCH less painful than the original.

Catheter is taken out along with the epidural. Peeing hurts. It doesn't burn, but it feels like I'm really bruised. My bladder cramps each time I empty it... I hate it. It hurts when my bladder is full.. feels like bad cramps. It makes my incision hurt. No one warned me about that little side effect

Nurses not bugging me as much - just making me walk around. Fun! Still doing breathing exercises to avoid pnemonia.

Nursing, holding, and taking care of baby much harder once epidural is out. Husband or someone to help me is necessary 24/7. I hate feeling so helpless.

Gas pains begin. What are gas pains? They happen after a lot of abdominal surgeries... air gets in during the operation and then gets trapped. It has no where to go.. so it moves around in huge bubbles. Sometimes you can feel them in your upper back and chest and it feels like you're having a heart attack. Mine were mainly all in my lower abdomen, right under that nice, fesh, incision. Walking is a magic cure!

Still no appetite at all. (except for the third baby)

Day 3 - Going Home From the Hospital with Baby

I was SO blessed. All three of my babies got to come home on day 3 after birth. I remember after my first Csection BEGGING to stay longer - but we had Medicaid at the time and they basically would've only kept me longer had I been on my death bed.

I finally get to shower on this day, too... praise God! (hospital bag tip - take those shower fresh wipes with you just in case!! I used them constantly!) I hesitantly look at myself in the mirror after undressing...

"Oh my gosh..."

What will you see in the mirror 3 days after having a baby? What will your body look like 3 days after having a baby? Well... for me... my boobs were ginormous - like a boob job gone horribly wrong big. My stomach actually looked tiny compared to its 9 month pregnant state. My arms and legs looked amazingly thin. (consider their size compared to the boobs and belly..) Seeing the huge bandages across my wound makes me cringe and makes my teeth hurt for some reason.

"Must pretend that's not there... just shower and get dressed!"

Shower is refreshing yet painful. I feel much better once I'm out, dressed, and back with my baby. People visiting comment how great I look... I am so out of it that I believe them.

Time to go home! The nurse wheeling me to the car manages to hit every bump that is located in the hospital, and I believe took a detour to a particularly horrible rigged walkway just to keep me from ever coming back again. (Fun Fact - after my first child was born and we were heading home, the nurse (who looked all of 14) actually said to me, "Wow, you must've gotten really big..." as she examined my body in the wheelchair. I so pray she wound up pregnant with triplets...)

Coming soon...

What to Expect Post Baby - The First 6 Weeks

"Welcome Home!" Says the Mess

Oh yes, I am braving up and showing the entire world what I came home to this morning. This is quite typical for our household, if I can be frank. In the morning we spend our time talking, cooking, eating, getting dressed, fixing hair, packing lunches, and getting out of the door. There is just no time scheduled in for cleaning. That, my friends, is not on the roster until I arrive home, grocery sacks in hand.

In all honesty, on mornings that I know I have a big day ahead of me, or am tired from the previous busy day, coming home to a messy house feels like a ton of bricks being placed on my shoulders. I mean, it isn't like I can come home and ignore this disaster while I start on other projects. (my Type A personality just won't allow it.)

I've thought of having mandatory chore time before the kids leave for school in the mornings to make this challenge a bit less overwhelming for me... but it just doesn't work for us. That would require even earlier wake-up times, and they already have chores to do once they come home from being at school working all day. I'd rather their mornings be peaceful and relaxing.

So, I'm finally finding a groove of balancing working from home, being a mom, and keeping the house up. It's tough! This pictured room is one of the most visited places in our entire house, so I make it a priority in up-keep. I actually timed myself this morning to see how long it really takes me to clean up all of this junk - can you guess? From picking up to unloading and loading dishes, wiping counters, the table, and sweeping... drum roll please....... 15 minutes! If I wouldn't have had to sweep today, it probably would've been more like 10. That really isn't so bad, so I'm going to try to stop feeling so overwhelmed about it. Just get in, get it done, and move on with my day. Hope I've encouraged you to do the same!

Sex Offenders - What Should Happen to Them?

When looking over some online news this morning, I stumbled across this horrible story.

A registered sex offender, that previously has spent 15 years in prison for choking and raping a woman back in 1989, is now responcible for this:

Investigators trying to identify six bodies found in the home of a convicted rapist in Cleveland are focusing the inquiry on eight or nine missing women.

You really have to read the entire story to grasp how horrible this really is. I mean.. talk about evil walking on earth - this man is it!

Everytime I read a story like this, I always scroll down to the last couple of paragraphs to see if the phrase "a registered sex offender" appears. Most of the time, it does.

How many women have to be brutalized, how many children molested and raped, how many people horribly hurt by sex offenders for our justice system to get the point: THEY CANNOT BE CHANGED. Show me ONE case of a serious sex offender getting caught, getting let go, and NOT repeating the crime. Maybe they're smarter the next time, maybe they learn not to get caught, but when people are true pedofiles or rapists, they just are. Period. End of story. No second chances.

Typically, this is the exact opposite of what I believe. I know that God forgives and that God can change anyone. However, I just don't think that, in the name of keeping people safe, these people should be given chance after chance to prove themselves changeable. If an adult brutalized a child - why is this not considered such a haneous crime that they are locked away for life? I know that issues of rape between adults are not always black and white, but if it is found that a man rapes a woman - and it is a black and white issue - how many chances should he be given in the future to rape more?

This just sends me into a rage. Time after time, these people are let out to simply do the exact same crimes they were put in prison for - and often times when they are released they are even more unstable than when they were first locked up. Notice how this guy went from "just" a rapist to now a serial killer/rapist.

Do people think that prison somehow reforms these truly insane people? Do they think they're receiving intense therapy while they are locked in a cell 23 hours a day? Even with therapy, does the public understand the almost non-existant success rate with rehabilitating sex offenders?

Am I the only person in  America truly outraged with this? Why is more not being done?

November - National Blog Posting Month

Have you lost your zest for blogging? Think a challenge will help you get back up and running? Then join in on the fun!

I found this on The (Un)Experienced Mom and decided to give it a go. The goal: 30 new posts in 30 days. I believe the only reward is the sense of accomplishment? We'll see if I come out victorious or if defeat is in my future. If you'd like to see if you have what it takes to complete this challenge, let me know! I'll keep track of your blog to help hold you accountable... as long as you also help me! ;)

Getting Your Toddler to Eat: Tips for Success

Have you ever gone to out to eat and just taken a second to sit back and look around? Often times I notice parents obviously feeling frazzled with their children, especially the ones in those toddler years. Now, most of us probably feel gray hairs coming on when our kids are acting crazy and all eyes are on us to "do something with that kid." But, have you ever felt that way simply because you cannot get your kid to eat? What about at your own kitchen table within the safety of your own home, where judging eyes cannot see? Umm.. yes.. I have!

I often think back and shake my head at myself and feel so sorry for my poor first child. First borns truly are mini experiments for their parents.

"Does she mind when I do this?"
"How do I make her stop screaming?"
"How do I make her sleep"
"Why is she so picky all of a sudden?!"

I recall feeling really upset when she'd stubbornly turn her nose up at new foods, as if her refusal to eat was purely out of rebellion. Who did she think she was trying to develop her own taste?

Today, I'm on my third two year old and am so thankful that he basically cannot pull anything new. Whether it's with tantrums, not minding, or picky eating... I've seen it before. I don't always know how to handle things, but one thing I do feel I've gotten a pretty good grip on is picky eaters, and how to work through those toddler-stubborn phases.

Here are just a few tips that I've learned along the way that I'd love to pass to anyone that hasn't had as many opportunities to learn from their own parenting trials and errors.

Tip #1 - Don't Expect Your 2-Year Old to Eat Like They Did at Age 1

At age 1, most toddlers are super excited about a new world of food. They want to taste and eat everything! If it's on your plate, it's soon to be in their mouth. Often times an eager to eat one-year-old morphs into a two-year-old that seems to require but a handful of food each day to survive. This happens to a ton of toddlers, so don't freak out too much. It's highly unlikely that any toddler will willingly starve themselves - so relax.

Tip #2 - You Can't Win This Battle

There are but two things in life a toddler has ultimate control over: What goes in, and what comes out. Learn this lesson as early as possible and I swear parenting a toddler will be soooo much easier.

Who else has tried to basically force feed a tyke with a spoon-full of "something" as they turn their head away and refuse to even take one taste? Who else has heard themselves say things like,

"Just one bite! It's so good!"
"You HAVE to eat this!"
"Fine, you can just sit here until you eat!"

Fun times at the dinner table, right?

The reason this is so frustrating for parents is often times because they've not yet realized that this battle is not worth fighting. You really cannot make them eat if they don't want to. Really.. you can't. Promise.

Tip #3 - It Isn't Worth Winning

If you do succeed in fighting your toddler to eat and use "scare tactics" like punishment for not eating, this may mean you are able to win this particular battle of the wills, but the war that might follow down the road is not worth it. Children do need to have some control over their own lives. There is no more basic control than deciding what you will or will not eat. Kids forced to eat often grow up to have serious food issues - either they decide to not eat and develop eating disorders (as a means of control) or they have no idea when to stop eating and they suffer with weight management issues. If toddlers learn early how to regulate their own appeties, it is a priceless skill they carry into adulthood.

Tip #3 - You Really ARE in Control

Don't let their scowling faces and fits at the table fool you. You really do have all of the control over what your toddler eats. Who buys the food? Who prepares the food? Who puts the food onto a plate to be eaten? The person in charge - that's who! Put that little tidbit into your parenting toolbox for safe keeping.

Tip #4 - Use Your Control Well

Often I hear parents complain that their kids only like 2 foods, or one food, and they just will NOT eat anything else. Really? Are you certain?

When you realize that this is a battle of the wills, and that you cannot force them to eat, but, that you do have all of the actual control over their food... you are on your way to victory!

Kids that truly will only eat one or two foods typically do so because somewhere down the line, that idea was encouraged. Once a toddler begins tantruming over new foods and wanting just the "Oldies and Goodies," a lot of parents become overwhelmed with the rejection of other eats and feed them their favorites out of fear. They simply don't want their child to go hungry!

My friends... rest easy. As harsh as it may sound, sometimes going hungry is just the answer. For a seriously picky eater - many parenting experts (as in those that have actual trails of letters behind their names proving their worth to us floundering souls) suggest simply putting a plate of food out, and then taking it away.

Can I say.. this actually does work! I heard this amazingly simple technique when my first was a toddler and have used it since. At first it seemed much too easy.

"No time-outs for not eating? No scolding? No forcing? What?!"

I would place food on her plate, we'd sit at the table, she'd say she didn't want it, I'd eat and encourage her to do so, she'd refuse. "Here we go..." I began warning her, "If you don't eat now, we won't eat again until snack time. If you don't want to eat, that's okay! But, Mommy isn't going to fix you anything else until snack time." She chose not to eat the first time. I followed through, picked up her plate after meal-time, and refused to fix her anything until snack-time. Oh the guilt!!

"Mommmmeee! I'm hun-geee!" Oh the fits... oh the tears. I felt like I was abusing her! I admit to scooting up snack-time almost an hour... thankfully she didn't know how to tell time to call my bluff. I prepared the snack I wanted her to eat and sat it in front of her. She ate it... all of it. That small tug of hunger pains was all it took! We kept this same plan for about two weeks, and before I knew it, she would try almost anything! I've done the same method for all of our kids. You eat, or you don't, that's up to you. However, if you don't, then you really don't eat.

I will say that I do try to make sure to make something I KNOW the kids enjoy at each meal, especially if I'm making something I think might make their noses go north. Because I don't have true "picky eaters," I've also been known to let them have a little something to snack on after supper if they happily tasted of all of the food and at least gave it a good effort. I mean, I don't like ALL foods... why should I expect them to?

Tip #5 - Remember Their Age

If you child is just two, then keep that in mind. Don't expect your two year old to be as willing to try new foods as a child three years older. On the flip-side, I personally DO expect more from my older kids. I do explain to them that their reactions to new foods shapes their baby brother's initial reaction as well. I love giving them opporunities to take on more responciblity with how their words and actions affect others!

Sometimes one of your children will just always be less excited about eating than the others. Hey, that's okay! Just keep putting those new foods out, without pressuring them, and watch what happens over time. Sometimes watching everyone else at the table enjoy a meal is just what the doctor ordered for a picky eater.

Meal-time really should be a laid-back, "Hey, how was your day" time. Help your kids relax and enjoy it, too. With a little encouragement, a little discipline and consistency, and a lot less pressure, you really can begin to enjoy life around the dinner-table with your kids.

Five Question Friday

Can you believe that tomorrow is Halloween already? Wow! I hope everyone's gearing up for a safe, silly, and FUN evening of trick-or-treating and eating candy until you puke. Oh yes... that is my idea of a good time...

It's time for Five Question Friday! If you'd like to join in on the fun, head on over to Mamma M's blog and grab all of the links! Happy Friday!

1. What were you doing the last time you really had a good laugh?


Just yesterday! Nothing makes me laugh like hearing my kids laugh. Something totally random had both of the boys rolling on the floor with those huge belly laughs - and who can't not join in on that fun? Everytime one of them would stop laughing, they'd see the other one still going and get kicked up again. I have no idea what even started this happy fest - but it was hilarious!

2. Who was your first CELEBRITY crush?
Hmmm... I 'think' it was Devin Sawa in Casper! I really can't remember that far back..

3. What is one talent that you wish you had?
Oh I really, really wish I could play instruments. Especially the piano and violin!

4. How often do you and your spouse go out w/o the kids? Is it frequent enough?
Definitely not frequently enough! We probably go out without the kids once  month... if that. Depends on what shift he's working. When we do go out, lately, we make an entire weekend out of it! So, that makes up for the lack of regularity I guess!

5. What colour(s) is your bedroom?
It's beige... the exact color is called "White Sands" or something similar. Pretty boring... but it works.

Fatigued Pilots - What Should be Done?

If you've been watching the news lately, one hot topic is mentioned at least once an hour: Pilot Fatigue.

This is an issue I actually never gave much thought. I, like many people in the world, assumed that proper restrictions were currently in place to keep plane crashes from occuring from preventable circumstances... you know.. like the pilot FALLING ASLEEP! Apparently, I was wrong.

This article on CNN's webiste says,

In the last 16 years, fatigue has been associated with 250 fatalities in air carrier accidents, Robert Sumwalt, NTSB vice chairman, said at an FAA symposium in July.

Well, doesn't that make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside?

Now the FAA is said to be trying to change the current allowed flight hours and the required amount of resting time between flights in hopes of preventing things like this happening in the future. Seeing as how they regulations have remained the same since the 1940's... I say it's well past due.

One request I've heard mentioned by the people in the airline biz is to simply allow pilots to nap in the cockpit during flights. Now, don't freak out... the truth is, pilots are already sleeping during your flight and you just don't know it. (according to about 80% of pilots that admit to sleeping during flights.) Wouldn't it be better to simply put safety policies in place so that this much needed sleep can occur SAFELY?

Other than take-off and touch-down... pilots say that the rest of the flight is almost always simply auto-pilot. If there are two pilots in charge.. why not let them take turns getting some Zzz's? If it means safer landings after 8 hours in the air... I say YES!

If letting them rest on the plane isn't a valid option, what other options are there?

Blog Makeover

If you think you've stumbled to the wrong place, don't fret - this is my blog, this is Peace and Craziness.. and it is currently experiencing Craziness. I am horrible with HTML and all of that jazz - so doing a small blog makeover is quite the feat for me. So, be patient, hang in there, and try not to be annoyed if I go through 35 different headers, fonts, colors, and layouts in the next few days. I promise to try to make this as painless as possible for all of us.

Review: Ergo Baby Carrier for Toddlers

Before I begin this post, I want to make sure that I write that this is NOT a paid advertisement. I simply LOVE my Ergo and haven't written a post about its functionality with a heavier toddler. With that said:

This is my Ergo

Inside of my Ergo is my 2 years and 4 months old son. He weighs right about 28 pounds now.. possibly 30. (I know, I'm one of those moms that doesn't know her kids' exact weights.) This is how we take the dogs for a walk - toddler happily riding on mommy's back. (By the way, these are our two rescue dogs Ava (the German Shepherd) and Cooper (the one-eyed Toy Poodle.))

I've used strollers for walks, and that's okay sometimes. The main two reasons I love using the Ergo instead are:

1. Bonding

When Samuel is riding in the stroller, he's kind of in his own world and so am I. When he's sitting up high on my back, he sees exactly what I see and he can talk to me with ease the entire time. I love seeing his little hand from the corner of my eye pointing to cows and horses and hearing him moo and "neigh!" at them as we walk past. I can explain all sorts of things to him while we walk without having him constantly lean around the canopy of the stroller and ask, "What? What Mom? What? What did you say? Mom?" Anyone that's spent much time walking with a toddler in a stroller, especially on a windy day, knows what I mean.

2. Ability to do More

When we walk using the stroller, we are GREATLY limited where we can travel. Strollers are super hard to push in grass with heavy kids in them. If the big kids want to walk off into a pasture to pick flowers, there's no wrangling with getting stuff out of the stroller, putting the stroller somewhere safe while you walk, and if your toddler is younger and not so steady on his feet, having to STILL carry him. (we've done this dance a few times.)

With the Ergo if we want to go somewhere, we just go! If Samuel wants out to go play, I just unlatch the top front strap, slip it off of my shoulders, grab his hands, and let him slide down my back to the ground. It's so simple! Why oh why did I not discover this amazing contraption with the other two children?

Another reason I really need something like this is so I can control dogs on walks. I've tied dogs to the stroller before, but it severly limits my ability to correct any misbehavior on walks. Having both hands to hold leashes - priceless!

So, what's the point of this post? Basically, to let all of you mommies know that life really can be easier with certain types of baby gear. This, in my opinion, is a must-have. No matter how big your toddler gets or how heavy they are, you can still COMFORTABLY carry them in the Ergo.

Soft "peanut-style" slings are super easy and sweet when you have a light newborn. I wish I'd have had one for those trips into walmart... but for the most bang for your buck, you just can't beat this product. I've used it since the week after Samuel was born, and see no signs of not being able to use it anytime soon. It's still looks just like new! No tears, rips, nothing. It's been chewed on by him for months on end when he was teething, washed in the washing machine several times (really.. many many washings) and used for almost 2.5yrs now. I know people that have had the same Ergo for several years, through several kids and it just holds up so well.

So, new mommies and mommies with toddlers.. take my advice and the advice of many moms in the world and grab an Ergo! You will never regret it!

Sam in the Ergo at 1 month old

Sam in the Ergo at 4 months old

Sam in the Ergo at 6 months old

Pregnancy: What the Books Won't Tell You

For all of my preggo friends and readers - this one's for you! The good, the bad, and the ugly of pregnancy through my eyes.

Let's start from the beginning - Before You Conceive.

First off - no one ever told me that when you don't want to become pregnant you are basically the most fertile person on earth. Then, when you're ultra ready to add another addition to your family, you can suffer from infertility. Who'd a thunk it, right? Yep.. it can happen. If it happens to you, take heart that you are not alone. There are so many women that have struggled and are struggling to become pregnant. Find those women via message boards, through friends of friends, through blogs... anyway you can. FIND THEM. Share your struggle with them, find people that truly understand the roller coaster ride of infertility because you will need them.

Then comes the question - Could I be pregnant? What are the symptoms?

Pregnancy symptoms vary so vastly from woman to woman... the typical symptoms books will list include things like tender breasts and menstrual type cramping. Of course, the missed period.

No book I ever read told me that the "menstrual type cramps" could be much, much worse than typical cramps. Before I was even expecting my period I would have horrid cramping, mainly in my lower back. Let's not forget the bloating... oh joy. Even before those symptoms, for me, was the super sore breasts. Yowzers! Tingles, stabbing pains, even sore armpits... this was always the first sign for me.

Finally, you pee on a stick and - BAM! You're pregnant! CONGRATULATIONS! Now what?

Well, again, this will vary from woman to woman. For THIS woman.. a timeline for the first trimester went something like this:

Week 4 - find out I'm pregnant - super excited, scared, in love, anxious... bloated, cramping, sore breasts.
Week 5 - Same symptoms but add in a bit of queesyness from time to time
Week 6 - Vomitting has hit. Throwing up at least twice a day - every day. Food is gross. I feel gross. "Why did I do this again?" - Also, psycho Mandy takes over. The hormones grip my brain and make me an irrational, angry, sad, or extremely happy person. Alternate these emotions over and over each day.
Week 7-12 - Throwing up so much that I'm blacking out from low blood sugar and dehydration. Getting put on meds to avoid going into the hospital. Meds work some... now only throwing up a few times a day again.

What a fun first trimester, right? Actually.. there were some pretty cool things that happened for me each time in those first three months. Namely - first doctor's appointment! First ultrasound to see that sweet little gummy bear, and best of all, seeing that beating heart. Instant love.  For pregnancy #2 and #3, the first trimester also included outgrowing my pants from my ever expanding belly. Yes, you really do show much faster the second + time. (and you show faster with each pregnancy.. from my experience.)

Enter the Second Trimester

Week 13 - The first pregnancy I expected to wake up feeling like a miracle had happened over night. All of the books say that morning sickness typically leaves by this week. So, why am I still puking constantly?
Week 14-16 - Still sick.. seriously? Yep... it happens. (all three times for me) By week 16 I can swear that I feel little tickles of baby movements. Too early to tell.
Week 16-20 - Definitely begin to feel baby movements! This makes all of the throwing up worth it! Still throwing up.. just to keep you updated. Psycho Mandy still ever present... though not quite as bad as a few weeks back. Husband probably glad to not have his wife be so crazy quite as often. Oh, cool stuff around this time - maternity clothes finally fit! I look pregnant and not fat! Hooray! Also, week 20 I get to find out the sex! Time to buy the first blue or pink outfit! I cry when I get it home and reality hits... "Precious one, you will be here soon, God willing."
Week 21-24 - Feeling super cute with my little belly. Loving baby motions. Not puking nearly as often.. sometimes only a few times a week now. Ahh.. this is why I loved being pregnant! For this period of time! Others can feel baby kicks now and when you have older kids, they really begin to bond with the little tyke. The fight over baby names is probably still on-going.
Week 24-28 - Still feeling great! Getting larger, trying not to waddle "already." Baby movements are huge now. "I swear I saw a foot stick out by my rib cage!" Husband is amazed at the alien-type activity he can feel through my skin. "Does that hurt?!" - I don't think I've thrown up this month... wow! New aggrivation has arrived... enter: Sciatic Nerve Pain. Oh yes.. I'd rather be puking.

The Third Trimester

Week 28-32 - Still feeling sort of cute and very obviously pregnant. Getting uncomfortable and wondering how I'll make it until the end. Sciatic Nerve Pain makes walking, sitting, lying down, and sleeping impossible. Those expensive maternity pillows you buy do help.. some. No more than folding your own pillows between your knees. Husband is slowly being pushed out of the king-sized bed by the fluff surrounding me. Also, my 7-step flip over, eight times a night, makes sleep impossible for both of us. "Why did I do this again?" The good news is, all of the being awake gives us plenty of time to finally decide on a name. It also gives me ample amounts of time to empty my bladder, again. And again. And.. again.
Week 32-36 - Okay... why am I puking again? Why is his foot hitting me down "there" and why does his rear have to be jammed directly inside my ribs 24/7? Baby... please change position! On the flip side - baby  moves regularly... super fun! Time for baby showers, organzing the nursery, cleaning the entire house like an insane person, and spending all of my time in baby-dreamland. All I can think of is the baby and the future.
Week 36-40 - I'm done. DONE. DONE! "Oh God, why did I do this?!!" I can't move. I can't breathe. I hurt from head to toe. I'm throwing up again which really makes that lovely sciatic nerve pain flare up. I love the baby more than ever and the anticipation to meet him or her is truly maddening. Due to this anticipation and pain - Psycho Mandy is in full swing. I will cry for any reason, I will yell for no reason, and I don't want to hear "It's just your hormones!" In my nine month pregnant brain, it is indeed 'you' that's causing the problem.. not the hormones. "I'm fine!"

Birth Day - With my first I went into labor a few days before my due date. No one told me that a first baby can take DAYS of labor to deliver. I never could have imagined such intense pain, for sooo many hours, with no relief. "This is crazy.. why am I doing this?" No one told me that you could go all natural for DAYS, dialate to 8cm, think you're soon to push, only to be told your baby's heartbeat is much too slow and you need an emergency csection. "That's just great..."

No one told me that having a csection is about 8 million times scarier than being in labor. Amazingly, once you accept the reality and just focus on your baby's birth, it's not so bad.

Not one of the books I had described what it was like to feel people inside of your belly, tugging, pulling, pushing... how it smells when they burn the skin to stop bleeding. What an experience. No friends of mine ever told me that my husband would be the amazing rock that stopped my fearful tears and got me through.

Finally, no one could have possibly warned me what I would feel when I first saw my baby. That first glimpse when they're still a weird shade of purplish-blue. Before the oxygen fills their lungs. When they're still all messy from the womb. Only a mother's eyes could see that little wet, messy, blue being and sob with love and joy. Only a mother could reach out anxious to touch, smell, kiss, and hold her baby - mess and all.

The most shocking thing about pregnancy to me has always been how the baby's birth makes many women ready to do it all over again. No matter how horrible you feel, or for how long, often times women MUST do it more than once. If this sounds insane to you, you're likely in your first or third trimester of pregnancy. Don't worry - you'll soon discover the same thing mothers before you have been discovering since the beginning of time.

Soon to come: Post Partum - What You Should REALLY Expect

Fit Mommy Wanna-Be

In these quiet hours of the night I can finally sit and reflect on the past few weeks. Gathering all of the information swirling in my head and organizing them into actual categories is beginning to take place, and one category keeps sticking out over the others: DIET/EXERCISE

It is amazing to me that I have all of the right information to be a super healthy and fit mom, I know exactly what to do, and what not to do, yet I still struggle. Why is that?

I tend to do one area really well, and blow the other. When I'm eating super healthy and cutting out the bad carbs, I tend to get more lax on my exercise. When I'm exercising like I should be, I swear my appetite is through the roof and I eat like I've not seen food in days. What gives?

Over the past month or two I've been getting into the exercise known as jogging. ("or yah-ging.. might be a soft J... apparently you just run!" - for any Ron Burgandy - Anchorman fans..) When I first started I could barely do one lap (1/4 of a mile) without feeling like one of my lungs might collapse. Now, such a short time later, I'm up to five entire laps before I have to take a walking break! I must say, I'm proud of my persistance to stick with something that has always been very difficult for me. I've never been good at jogging long distances. (not that a mile is a "long distance".. but it is on my scale!)

I did not anticipate that all of the intense cardio I was doing would simply amp up my metabolism, which would make me want to eat like a 200-pound man. Of course, I never crave healthy foods in these hunger fits, oh no! I want chocolate, cereal, crackers, chips - anything that will give me instant fuel.

I've now realized that I'm working really, really hard just to stay the exact same size. Phewy. I've got to get this eating under control. I feel like it's a constant battle in my life. How can something like food be such a joy and such a burden all at the same time?

My new plan is to keep up the jogging (and weights a few times a week) but add more lean protein into my diet, and a lot more fiber to help keep me full. Whole grains, chicken, and turkey... here I come!

This really shouldn't be so difficult...

When the Going Gets Tough...

... it's usually because the tough are sick.

Some type of bug has reached my immune system and defeated it. I am super congested and just a bit sluggish. Not so bad that I feel like it's anything that will turn into a big deal, but just bad enough to make it hard to get the daily grind accomplished. To whom do I turn in my sick day pass?

This all began Sunday night after church and by Monday morning I felt almost as horrible as I looked. My empathetic husband got the kids up and off to school without waking me and that helped tremendously! The rest of the afternoon, however, I was flying solo. Of course, this cold comes on full strength the day of both kids' Parent Teacher Conferences and Madison's dance class. From 2:30pm until 8:30pm I was running like crazy - all three kids in tow.

Thankfully, the PTC's both went incredibly well. I felt a bit spoiled getting to hear from two great teachers how utterly amazing they believe my children to be. I was very proud to see all A's from both kids and the highest marks allowed for behavior, manners, and attentiveness. I feel this is a bigger sign of the amazing quality of teachers my kids both have (and have had!) than any sign of my superb parenting skills. (which are potentially dwindling by the second today.)

Thankfully we made it to and home from dance class with little trouble - thanks to Tylenol Cold and Sinus. I avoided speaking directly to people and kept warning everyone that I was sick. 90% of the moms said, "Oh, don't worry, I'm with you there!" So, we all kept each other company and in supply of Kleenex.

Bedtime went much easier than I had anticipated. Carter was eager to read to me before bed, Madison was exhausted and couldn't wait to go to sleep, and even Samuel listened to stories and nodded off by 8:30. Thank God for small blessings!

This morning was the usual trip to drop kids off at school and the head home to load up a dog to take to the vet. (He's being neutered this morning.. even with this event he will amazingly still love me when I pick him up tomorrow. Aren't dogs fantastic?!) Samuel and I finally made it home, had lunch, and now he's napping. I decided to take a writing break before I dig into housework.

I know this is a totally random post. Blame my cloudy brain for not being able to think up one interesting thing to post about today - and my body for not having the energy to do any type of research. No matter how I usually make myself out to be, I really do not have a cape with a big 'S' that I wear around the house.

White House Tries to Exclude Fox News from Interview

The plot thickens! Obama is soon to really sink himself with any conservatives that are left on his side with these antics.

I can't possibly write this as well as Fox has done, so here is a small portion of the full report.

The Obama administration on Thursday failed in its attempt to manipulate other news networks into isolating and excluding Fox News, as Republicans on Capitol Hill stepped up their criticism of the hardball tactics employed by the White House.

The pushback came after White House senior adviser David Axelrod told ABC News' "This Week" on Sunday that Fox News is not a real news organization and other news networks "ought not to treat them that way."




Media analysts cheered the decision to boycott the Feinberg interview unless Fox News was included, saying the administration's gambit was taking its feud with Fox News too far. President Obama has already declined to go on "Fox News Sunday," even while appearing on the other Sunday shows.

Thankfully, the other networks all decided that they would send none of their reporters if Fox News wasn't also there.

Wow, is this really happening? When did we begin our loss of Freedom of the Press? I am still in America... right?

Even if you are not a Fox News fan (which is pretty unlikely if you like my blog.. but welcome aboard anyway, if not!) this should be very concerning and outrageous to you! When the President and his goonies begin deciding what stations are worthy of reporting news - we are in big trouble!

I, personally, find this extremely offensive! Does the President not realize that the MAJORITY of Americans watch Fox News? The MAJORITY of Americans are conservatives (not necessarily right-winged all the way, but definitely not liberal) and many of Fox's shows (such as my favorite, hosted by Mr. O'Reilly) are ranked NUMBER ONE amongst all other national media? Americans trust Fox News for the most part.. and for the White House's Senior Advisor to say that Fox isn't a "real" news organization is incredibly insulting to the majority of Americans that turn to them daily for news.

I believe that most news organizations report true news... they just put their own spin on it to make the people look good that they support. I have no doubt that Fox could do these same things, but being that I like the people that they like, it works out for me.
Well, America, you wanted change. Change is what you're getting! It is definitely not change I can believe in...

Attachment Parenting: CoSleeping

CoSleeping is a pretty hot topic amongst parents and doctors alike. Is it safe? Is it a bad habit to start? Who should and should not cosleep?

Let's start by stating what cosleeping is NOT. Co-sleeping is NOT falling asleep with your infant in your bed, in your arms on the couch, or with you in the recliner. Tossing a baby in your bed out of sleep deprivation desperation is simply that - putting your baby into your bed. It is not safely co-sleeping.

First question - Is co-sleeping safe? The answer is, YES. If done correctly, co-sleeping has actually been proven to reduce the chance of SIDS in infants. How can this be when the media is constantly reporting yet another infant death due to bed sharing? Let's look at this, shall we?

If parents are commited to safe co-sleeping, then they will take several precautions.

1. Remove heavy blankets from the bed. (may mean you have to dress more warmly for bed yourself.)
2. Push the bed flush with a wall in the bedroom - or attach a cosleeper to one side of the bed. (we chose to use a cosleeper.)
3. Do NOT put baby between mom and dad. Baby should be between the wall or cosleeper and MOM. (Mothers are naturally more in tuned with where the infant is in the bed, as opposed to dads who are just naturally not programmed the same way.)
4. Put baby to sleep in your bed on their back - the same safe way suggested to put babies down in cribs.
5. Do not over-bundle baby for bedtime. Your body heat will keep baby much warmer than a baby that is lying alone in a crib or bassinet, and overheating is very dangerous for infants.
6. NEVER consume alcohol or drugs before co-sleeping. Even one glass of wine can significantly decrease your awareness of your infant and it definitely induces deeper sleep. Even common drugs like allergy medications are not okay to take before co-sleeping.

If you follow these simple steps, you are probably going to have a very safe and happy co-sleeping experience.

The next question is one I've been asked a lot: Why start co-sleeping in the first place?

Great question! The answers are varied from one parent to the next. Many parents choose to co-sleep from the start because "it just feels right," or "I just couldn't sleep without my baby next to me." These reasons are very real and wonderful reasons to begin co-sleeping with your new baby.

Some start for health reasons. Studies have proven that when co-sleeping is done SAFELY, SIDs is reduced. How? The baby's breathing and body temperature are all regulated simply by being next to Mommy. If that isn't evidence alone that co-sleeping is nature's way, I don't know what is.

My reasons were different. I started co-sleeping out of pure necessity. Personally, I would have rathered my babies be in the cosleeper beside my bed than in bed with me. I slept better that way. Problem was, my babies never slept better that way.

What new parent hasn't had the experience of finally getting that sweet bundle off to dreamland, only to find that when you put them into bed, the eyes pop open like one of those baby dolls and the screaming begins. I definitely found that to be the case with all three of my babies. The solution, let them sleep with me.

Once I got over the American idea that babies are supposed to sleep alone, and did with  Mother Nature was telling me to do, I loved the more peaceful nights! I could nurse my baby lying in bed, and then simply roll them away from me a bit and both of us could snooze happily. Ahh... sweet sleep...

Many have asked logistical questions about co-sleeping. Mainly: Do you always have to go to bed at the same time as your baby if you co-sleep? I want ME time at the end of the day!

Another great question, and again, the answer will truly be - it depends.

Personally, I tried VERY hard to teach my babies to fall asleep on their own or to go to bed at first without me. Then, when they'd wake at night for the first feeding, the co-sleeping would begin. However, sometimes babies (like my second child) refuse to sleep anywhere but with mommy... ever. This can be incredibly exhausting, draining, and frustrating. I know - I've lived it.

With my baby that was this way, it started from birth. We co-slept in the hospital bed his first night out of the womb to stop his screaming from the bassinet. He knew where he needed to be, and he wouldn't settle for any place else. At first I thought it was sweet. In those first post-baby emotions, your newborn can do no wrong. After about two weeks of this, I was already exhausted with it. I just wanted a minute for myself! The truth is, I rarely got it. I know this isn't what you want to hear if you are struggling with a baby or toddler like this currently, but I want to let you know that it does happen to lots of moms and babies/toddlers.. and it also ENDS for us as well.

My little man spent some duration of each night in my bed for his first 3 years. Yes... three YEARS. Trust me, I did EVERYTHING to try to stop it. I did the Super Nanny technique of simply putting him back into bed each time he would get up. It would go on for hours before he would finally fall asleep in his bed. Then, he'd be back up a few hours later. I was determined, so I settled for exhaustion and continued the marathon "put him back in bed" routine for days and days on end. It just would not work for him. We were both exhausted, I was super angry with him, and in the morning I didn't even want to look at him because he had kept me up all night.. again.

Just like with realizing spanking wasn't for me.. I realized this was NOT for me. Not with this child, anyway. I turned to my attachment parenting friends for help. Their advice: put a pallet or mattress on the floor beside your bed and tell him he can sleep there, or in his bed. I agreed to try it, not thinking he would EVER settle for the floor of our room. But, he did! He slept on a crib mattress beside our bed from the ages of 2.5 to a little over 3. Once he hit age 3, he was finally able to transition to his room. He'd spend a few nights a week in his bed in his room, and a few nights still in our room. By age 4, he was mostly in his room and we removed the mattress from our floor. (we talked about how when he turned 4 the mattress would be gone to try to prepare him.)

He did okay with it. He sometimes would cry beside my bed wanting to sleep in the floor, but I'd take him back to his room, comfort him, and he would eventually settle back in for the night.

Now, age 5, he's 100% in his bed. All night - every night. No waking up, no waking us up. Ahh.. sweet sleep.

I will say that he is the only of the three that struggled like this. His baby brother slept through the night before he did. Seriously. When it comes to your children, they are all different and that's why no one technique will work on them all. Some of your infants and toddler - you may have to go to bed when they do for a while. The goal, in my opinion, is to SLOWLY wean them from it in a non-traumatic way.

For Carter - giving him a teeny tiny flashlight worked wonders! He only got to play with it at bedtime. I would tell him that if he'd lay quietly BY HIMSELF, that he could have the flashlight. He'd almost always fall asleep with it still shining - no mommy required. He still sleeps with that flashlight, actually!

Some moms I know swear by sticker charts. There's not even a reward for earning a certain number of stickers.. just the joy of getting a sticker! (it works!)

Somtimes you can just start with, "Lay here by yourself first, Mommy has to do something and then I'll be back." At first, only be gone for a minute or two at most... keep to your word. Then, slowly lengthen the time it takes you to come back until you can say, "Go on to sleep and I'll be in later." This can be a S-L-O-W process. Stay patient and remember that you are your child's only real security in this world. It makes sense that they need you in the scary night.

Co-sleeping can be a parent's best friend if done correctly. Not all kids may need it, but if yours does, I hope this gives you a few pointers on how to start it safely, and how to begin the ending process when you are ready. When it feels like your toddler will truly NEVER sleep alone, keep in mind that it is highly unlikely that your 16 year old will come home one night, toss the keys on the nightstand, and crawl into bed with Mom and Dad. All good things must come to an end... just hang in there!