Getting 6 Kids Ready for School - Without Drama

Most of my readers probably don't "really" know me in real life. How I am daily, what stresses me out, and what I can and cannot tolerate. Let me give you a quick run-down. I despise whining, but even more than that, I HATE being late. It literally makes me feel physically ill if I'm 5 minutes late going anywhere. From getting to church on time, getting the kids to school, or even a casual lunch date with the girls.

Having 6 kids can definitely make being on time harder. Enter: my method of success. I'll stick with our morning "get to school on time so mom doesn't freak out" routine because I know that, for me, it has been the toughest to get right.

Typical wake up time favorite - make the baby laugh!

Before Bed - Set out clothes for EACH child where they can reach them

6:40am - wake up big kids. (Carter, Waylon, Madison, and Emily)
*All kids are expected to be FULLY dressed, socks and shoes included, before exiting their bedrooms.
While I finish cooking breakfast, the girls must brush their hair. Breakfast is held hostage. Until you are COMPLETELY dressed, you will not eat. It's amazing how quickly they hop to it around here!

7:00am - Breakfast is served. All kids must clean their spot at the table (or, from in front of the TV... whatever..) after they eat. Once the big kids are eating I wake up the two littles, Samuel and Dakota. Sam dresses himself, I dress Dakota - then they join the crew for breakfast.

7:20 - Brushing teeth time - this is also when I "do" the girls' hair. I'm getting fast at this now!

7:30 - Gather your stuff (that I line up in the playroom each night against the wall by the garage door) - get in the van - time to go.

This is seriously how our mornings typically go. I don't nag. I don't demand. Madison has almost been left at home because she is my S-L-O-W-E-S-T child. My rule is if you're not in the van at 7:30, then you will wait at home and I will come back and pick you up and take you to school AFTER I've dropped off everyone else. I refuse to let one kid make the entire crew late. I'm thankful that I have the luxury of not having to be at work at 8am so I can pull this off. Never had to do it... I think I do what I say I'll do enough that they believe my threats. They know their mom is a bit off her rocker...

Sometimes Dakota is taking his breakfast in the van.. he's my slowest eater and the one that will tantrum if I try to do the "Here, you can finish them when we get back home in 10 minutes.." talk. What's a few more crumbs in the van, right?

TV is a luxury in the mornings. If they are being too slow, it goes off. Otherwise, I do let them watch cartoons. Can I be for real and say it just makes mornings more relaxing and enjoyable for ALL of us? Yes, I'm "that" mom... and I was the same way when I just had 3 kids. I fully admit to being as lazy as possible - when possible. So there.

This is what works for me! As long as I'm prepared and organized BEFORE I wake the kids up, things run smoothly. What's the hardest "getting ready" time in your house?

What Doubling My Kids in a Month has Taught Me

Going from 3 kids, to 6 kids, in a matter of a month has taught me a lot in a hurry. Learn or go nuts - one or the other will happen without a doubt.

I've called and harassed  asked all of my "bigger than normal family" friends what their tips and tricks are since my house suddenly filled up. I've learned a few things and I thought I'd share 'em with you. In case any of you are as completely, totally, and ridiculously insane as I am and want to ever parent this many children.. or more.

Dishes - My good friend Brandy said that her kids all have a color of dishes that belong to them. That way, they can use the same cup during the day and not mess up 3 (or 10 in some of my kids' cases..). Also, if "someone" forgets to clear their spot at the table after meals... they're instantly found out.

I haven't gone out to purchase color-coded dishes, but I have been using the "one cup a day" rule. Wow.. what a difference! I did not realize how many cups we were running through, but it's cut down drastically. Just think, if everyone in our house just used 2 cups a day - that would be 16 cups in ONE DAY. Ay-Yi-Yi!

Laundry - Many of my large family friends have said they keep clothing to a minimal. Some have a rule of "you have 'x' amount of space for your clothes.. if you have more clothes than can fit there - you have too many.

I do think this is a smart rule. But.. well... umm... I just like to buy clothes! Even with this many kids, as old as they all are, I still see them as real-life dolls. Especially my girls. How fun is it to dress up your girls?! So our bows and frills have mostly turned into jeans and sneakers but thankfully Sketchers invented Twinkle Toes and "girly moms" like me everywhere rejoiced! 

They are so stinkin' cute!

So, I've come up with different rules that work for me and my shop-a-holic ways.

We have two kids per bedroom. Each bedroom has its own LARGE hamper. When that hamper is full, I just take the whole thing to the laundry room and in it goes. I don't separate anymore. I'll pick one day every now and then and bleach white if they need it, but for daily purposes, it all goes together. It's super easy to take them from the dryer and right into the room they came from for putting it away. Towels have their own hampers in the bathrooms. Bathrooms have hooks.. each child is expected to use their same towel and hang it up at least 2 or 3 times.

And, I do laundry EVERY day. I've always done laundry every day since having 3 kids... but now I do a few loads EVERY day. It is just part of my daily routine now and doesn't seem as hard as it sounds. It saves me from having "Oh no we don't have any towels, socks, or jeans!" panic attack moments.

Food

This is where the going gets tough. I cannot believe how much food we're going through! I refuse to back down from my "we WILL eat healthy" rules... so we're just spending more right now. Ugh...

I'm thinking over meals and seeing how I can make healthy options that don't cost a fortune. For example, last night we had chicken marinated in Italian dressing (cooked in pan with a bit of non-stick spray, no oil, nothing.) with brown rice (from the box, that you have to cook for 35 minutes instead of my normal "boil in a bag" kind.) and green beans.

Fed all of us, was healthy, and didn't cost much! Hooray! If you have healthy meal options for a LARGE family that won't break the bank, PLEASE send them my way!

I've also gotten really strict on "random eating." With just 3 kids I didn't mind if they grabbed snacks whenever they wanted... but that has come to a sudden halt. We have 3 meals, and two snacks, at scheduled times. At first this felt way too rigid... I hated doing it. Now it's just normal! We're actually saving a lot of money by cutting down on them just grazing, and they're eating meals much better. Duh.

These are just a few of the things I've learned so far. There are many more but how long does one blog post really need to be? Share your tips and tricks with me! I could use them!



I am Completely, Totally, Clueless

Over the past couple of months, the husband and I have been looking at house plans. I thought this would be a really fun experience, but as I sit and look at this book of "the 425 best-selling home plans" I feel very, very, small.

One would think you could figure out what your family needs in a home. How many bedrooms, bathrooms, one-story or two. An office? A playroom? Do we need a formal dining room or is an eat-in kitchen sufficient? I. Have. No. Idea.

So far, my favorite "on paper" house plans are laid out with the master bedroom and main living areas downstairs, and the other bedrooms upstairs. I've been told by a few people that it's a lot cheaper to build up than out, so to get the most space for your money, two-stories is the way to go. That sounds appealing.. but does walking up and down stairs to put away the 13 loads of laundry a day I'll be doing speak to me? Not in a nice way...

"I'd love to go for a walk today... but I can't move my legs after climbing 10 miles of stairs. Sorry."

My biggest debacle is bedrooms. How many should we have? At first, I thought 4. One for us, three extra. Kids can share... that'll be fine. Now, 5 is looking better. Someone may NEED their own room. We fill up 4 bedrooms with just the three kids we have now. Oh I don't know. It's a good thing this isn't a time-sensitive issue... we have tons of time to try to figure this all out.

Have you ever built a house? Done a lot of house hunting? What would you want if you could pick and choose your ideal home with a large family? Help a lady out!

A Letter to the Unknown

Hey there... whoever you are. We're here and we're waiting for you to join our family. We don't know how old you are, how long you'll stay, if you're a boy or a girl, what color you are, or anything about you. All we know is we've worked really hard over the past few months to get ready for you. We've redone a bedroom:

We made a closet for your things.

We were given a beautiful Moses Basket in case you are very small.

If you are a boy, I'll cover this with a blue blanket or something...

We have a cozy spot in our room for you, in case you're too young to be in a room without us.

I suppose we've done all we can to prepare for the unknown. We've completed endless paperwork, taken two months of classes, had a few home inspections, taken CPR/First Aid classes, had two TB tests, physicals, state and federal background checks... am I missing anything?

Today we had our BIG home study. It went beautifully. It seems all of our prep work paid off. Now we wait. From what we've been told, you could be joining our home in one to two weeks.. or at most 30 days. Of course, we know that God's timing is never something we can squeeze into a time frame - so we will sit in patience and know that whoever you are, God will bring you here when the time is right. Maybe you're not even born yet. Maybe you've not been noticed by anyone yet... does anyone see your bruises? Your pain? I don't know what your story will be. I don't know anything. My type-A personality is going crazy because this is one thing I cannot plan for.

Here we are. We're waiting for you! We want to show you what real love is. We want you to feel at home here for however long or short your stay is. We want the Father's love to pour down on you like crazy while in this crazy household. Our prayer is simple - that whatever God's purpose for us, it will be played out beautifully in your life. No matter how crazy everyone thinks we are for wanting to help you, we know that this is God's will. It isn't for us to look good, it's for him to look good. Child, I have a feeling that you will make God shine like crazy! Praying for your sweet life - whatever that life may hold.

Love,

Your Future Foster Mom

One Closet Down - Two to Go

My hubby has been earning major brownie points today. He has nearly completed the "extra closet" transformation. He decided on a double-rod system, which I am a big fan of. He built a small shelf area on the right hand side and we'll probably get a small dresser to stick in there for socks and underwear and such. I was so excited to start hanging some of Emily's clothes in there. (I got some to keep here for her, much easier than packing and unpacking each time!)

Madison was so impressed with her daddy's handy work that she asked him to redo HER closet as well. Being that she is tightly wound around his little finger - he immediately agreed. He's off to town now with our middle boy to buy more supplies. Not wanting the boys to feel left out.. he's decided, on his own, to also redo their closet. Oh boy... this will be a day!

Our closet doors are ordered, they should be in around Thursday. I cannot wait! Is it a bad sign when new closet doors make you seriously giddy? They should look something like this:

Bi-fold picture frame doors

Things are coming together nicely! I am so ready for it to all be finished! I do not enjoy living in renovation limbo.

Emily's First Stay

Let me start by saying I'm quite sick today - but better than yesterday or the day before. I'm pretty sure it's the flu... some of the girls at the Baptist Home came down with the flu last week, and of course we're always over there so.. all of my symptoms and the timing.. yeah... it's been awful. Any-who.. due to my feeling plain icky, I'm just sharing some quick, not great pics of the girls' room. It's not finished, but functional.

The two twin beds are working out very well. Plenty of room (not that you can tell that from my wonderful photography skills) and no one is freaking out about sleeping on the top bunk. Having the room arranged like this makes me realize if we do need a bunk bed AND the twin bed in the future, we can totally make that work.

The closet still isn't done. I need my hubby to do that and he's had zero time. It'll get done...

These baskets served as little drawers for some of Emily's stuff while she was with us. It worked out really well! We could fit her clothes into Madison's regular closet since she was only staying a few days this time, so it wasn't a big deal this go round.

Her stay was great, by the way. She fits in perfectly with our family! The hardest part, of course, is her not wanting to leave. (and us not wanting her to leave...) We just keep saying how thankful we are for the time that we do get to spend together. We feel so blessed to get to have her as a part of our lives! It's funny how you start this thinking you're helping a child, and you quickly realize how God puts specific children into your life, how deliberate his plan is, and how he makes it work for not just them, but for YOU. I am forever changed based on these past several months. I can only imagine how much greater the changes will be as time goes on.

Getting Ready for Emily!

Okay, due to the nature of her case, I feel fine saying that "E" is Emily. She is soon to come and stay with us for about two weeks and we couldn't be more excited! Last night, we had the entire girls' cottage (plus house parents) over for supper, and Emily came running out of the van saying, "I'm your family friend!!" She hugged all of us and she and Madison spent several minutes squeeling and jumping up and down. I couldn't help but laugh!

So, to prepare, we are in serious "get Madison's room ready" mode. We've bought matching bedding, and now we are rearranging everything to allow use of the extra closet and to fit another bed. We're still contemplating bunk beds, but for now, we're going to see how two twin beds work. Neither girl is happy about the possibility of sleeping on the top... so until we have foster children here, bunk beds probably won't work out too well.

This is where we've made it so far today:

Basically we've moved her bed from the extra closet (that served as a super cute nook over the past year) and put it onto a side wall. We moved her bookshelf beside the bed, and the plan is to put the other twin bed, on the other side of the bookshelf. I hate that the other bed will be so close to the window, but since we have two walls of her room completely taken up by closets.. we have no other real options as far as where to place beds.

Madison has spent the past hour going through her MOUNDS of books. Sorting out the "baby" ones, as she calls them, and putting the her favorites or the ones she's most excited to read on this shelf, so that we can put the remainder on a different shelf... that I'm still not quite sure where will be placed.

This is the empty space that we are so thankful we have to turn into another closet. I love it because it actually continues back a bit past the door frame - perfect for storing stuff you don't need all of the time.

I'm taking a quick break before we go back and keep working. I'm already exhausted! Getting this project done will be a huge weight off of my shoulders!

Breathe In... Breathe Out

Life has suddenly become very crazy, but on the flip-side, much more relaxing in the past few weeks. I knew that getting out of credit card debt would take some stress off of us, but I had no idea it would be this dramatic. I didn't realize how much mental stress I was under constantly worrying over it, wondering how we'd pay it off, wondering how long it would take. Years later... we finally made it! We also just paid off our van... and I totally understand what the person felt that coined the phrase "it's like a huge weight lifted off of my shoulders." Money can't make a miserable person happy... but when a happy person finally doesn't have to worry about money anymore - wow!

Now that mucho stress has been removed from my mind, I also made the decision to majorly cut back on work. We now don't need my income at all. (can you hear the angels singing?) I can just work for enjoyment and for 'extra' cash, which is of course ideal. Now, my Canine Corrections clients.. don't get all upset. I promise I'm not quitting! Just cutting back. You will need to schedule boarding a lot more in advance - and be prepared for more "no's" than before. This is me entering my "I'm tired of being so tired" stage of life... already.

This weekend I had arranged to have NO work. My last dog for boarding went home Saturday (and she was super easy anyway) and that was that. Sadly, Samuel and I both ended up sick... so we had no real fun, but what a RESTFUL weekend. Oh how we needed that. I barely got off the couch. Clayton and I watched movies, the kids and I built castles with blocks, played Wii, read books, and just sat around. With the stormy weather we barely even went outside. What a dark, rainy, GLORIOUS weekend. There was nothing we "had" to do. I cannot remember the last time we had a weekend totally off. This is going to be a more regular thing now. Clayton has weekends off, and I will have a lot off myself. I just have to make it happen.

It was so hard to turn down work before. Sure I was tired, I wanted a break, but the debt hanging over our heads pushed us both to just buckle down and sacrifice in the short term. As Dave Ramsey says, "Live like no one else so that you can live like no one else." We definitely felt like no one else was living like we were! It was hard, it took forever, BUT IT WAS WORTH IT! Now, from now on, we can relax! What a blessing!!

A strange side-effect of financial freedom is that I'm suddenly very content with the things I have. My desire to buy a new car totally vanished with the last check we gave to the credit union. My urgency to move... gone. My new desire? SAVE MONEY. We're fine here... really. Could we be more fine in a larger home, closer to town? Umm.. yeah. But, for now, this is cool. We can do foster care here and this home has already passed our first DHS home visit. (whew! That was Thursday.) It makes sense to live as cheaply as possible in order to care for more children if I stop and think. Not being able to buy that perfect house that I loved a month ago is making total sense now. Now we sit in waiting. We will wait for God to place the perfect place into our laps. As Clayton always tells me when I get impatient (which is often),
"God has taken amazing care of us all of these years... do you think he's not doing it now?"

Ugh.... I know.. he's right. God has blessed us so much more than we deserve. He's let us suffer consequences from poor choices we've made along the way, but we've discovered that even that was a blessing. How can you learn from your bad decisions if he doesn't allow you to feel the pressure of what happens because of them?

So, today I sit here with ONE dog for daycare, one sickly son that is begging to go for a walk in the "stroll-wer", and a full and content heart. For today anyway...

Room Re-Do... again?

We recentely painted and organized Madison's bedroom into more of a "big girl" room and I posted about that here. She loves it and so do I! Now, we have to reorganize this room with avengence. Our Baptist Home stuff should be done very soon and we'll have "E" coming to stay with us for much longer periods of time. She'll need her own bed and at least some space for her things for a few days' time. On top of that, we'll also hopefully have our DHS stuff done in the next several months and we'll be in need for another bed, anyway.

Thus begins my wheels a' turnin'. What do we need?

Bunk beds like in the boys room? Two twin beds decorated all cutesy? How do I organize more clothes and shoes and STUFF?

Thankfully Madison's room is a mega room as far as kids rooms go. It was the original master bedroom in this house before they added on what is now the master. She has two large closests in her room... we only use one of them for her stuff and the other has been designated the "bed nook." So, we could at least have enough closet space, which is priceless!

I plan to begin my online hunt for beds today. I'm always looking for the best deals for the best stuff. If it is a bunk bed, I have to have white. Everything in Madison's room is white - so let the search begin!

I get so excited over stuff like this! I love to decorate, redecorate, and organize. It's such a challenge to look at a space and figure out a way to make it work for the job it needs to handle.

On top of being excited about this, I'm completely overwhelmed! I was on the phone with a friend that currently has three foster children and three bio children this morning, while I was aimlessly walking around Walmart with Samuel, and I said, "Umm.. when you figure out how to get all of your stuff to fit in your house, you MUST come to mine and show me how to make it happen!" At least I have good organizational mentors...

What's Your Cleaning Schedule?

There are a few things that I know for sure. Each day that I am blessed to wake up and get out of bed, I will breathe air, I will eat chocolate, and I will clean the house. Every. Single. Day.

My kids help out a lot. They pick up after themselves which takes care of lots of clutter lying around everywhere. They clean their messes after showers and they clear their places at the table after eating... my husband is a super handy house guy as well... so why am I cleaning so much? What's left? Oh yeah... laundry, floors, and laundry again.

One thing that I have managed to figure out about keep up with house work is that I have certain things that must happen every day. EVERY day. Laundry is one of them.. then dishes... and floors.

I try to do a load or two of laundry every day - and I do mean from washer to closet. That's tough for me for some reason. I really have to gear myself up to get anything from the dryer to its designated place in the house. If I don't follow this schedule, we will run out of something. It never fails. With as many clothes as we have, there are never enough clean blue jeans, socks, or underwear. How is this so? I cannot wait for them to wear flip flops EVERYWHERE soon so that I can lay off the whites for a while.

Dishes are a given. I don't know anyone with kids that doesn't run their dishwasher at least once a day. I have a once a day rule here. It gets filled, it runs, and that's it. I don't empty it until the same time the next day, and I don't worry about the dishes in the sink until then, either. If I load the dishwasher and only two bowls couldn't fit, those bowls will absolutely sit in the sink until the next day. I don't wash by hand. Ever. (My husband has so sweetly taken this on as his job. My cookwear that isn't dishwasher safe gets scrubbed by the man in the house - or it sits in the sink until I HAVE to clean it to cook again.) I figure that cleaning counter tops goes hand in hand with doing dishes...

Floors. Oh boy the floors.

I admit that I have a slightly unnatural obsession with clean floors. You'd think that the kids that we have in and out of this house would have broken me from it, but no luck. I vacuum once or twice every day. I cannot handle dirt showing on my floors. I sweep almost every day - which is a bigger job but I hate feeling crumbs and grit on my bare feet so I make it happen. (sometimes not until 10:00 at night... but at least it stays clean for a few hours that way.)

Do you have jobs around the house that you feel you HAVE to do each day to function? What is your general cleaning "schedule" to make things run smoothly around your house?

When It Rains, It Pours

Have you ever heard sayings like "bad things happen in 3's" or "that's just Murphy's Law."? Yeah, probably so..

Doesn't it seem like when something bad happens, EVERYTHING bad happens? You can never just have a flat tire, but you then also have to need a new battery the next week and a new engine by the month's end.

I have to say that over the past several months I felt like this was pretty much how life was going. Don't get me wrong, we had tons of joy and amazing blessings in these months - but they were some fairly dark days for me.

It started in November with Dad dying (which is still a huge struggle of mine) and it seemed like things went downhill from there. Clayton's transfer from being on the Highway to getting to be a Detective kept getting pushed back.. and pushed back. It seemed like it would never happen and we'd have to be stuck in this awful schedule and stress forever. Our fight against debt was moving more slowly than I was happy with even though my business is booming and we'd been making wise financial decisions. There were days that I'd think,

"How can things be so good.. and so bad.. all at the same time?"

Over the past two weeks, I've realized something else. When it rains.. it pours.. BLESSINGS.

Just as we trudged through so much yuck and muck over the past several months, now it seems like God has completely blown away those dark clouds to reveal huge and amazing things.

The first 'bad' thing.. Dad dying.. well, nothing has changed there of course. Dad's still dead.. I'm still sad.. family's still hurting. I am thankful that I no longer cry everyday - and that I can almost complete a thought or a memory about Dad without bursting into hysterical sobbing. I mean.. seriously.. when it's that bad you've got to give thanks to God for any amount of relief you feel!

The second hurdle - the transfer. It finally happened! The letter came - and I nearly cried when Clayton waved it in front of me and said, "It came!" (I'd have probably jumped up and down if he and I weren't both totally down with a stomach flu.. another post another day.) That was this Saturday - and I'm contemplating framing that letter and hanging it in place of my favorite framed art that we have in the house. He has a lot of training to make it through at first, but after that, we're looking at a more normal schedule (as in like 7am-4pm unless all hell breaks loose and someone decides to rape someone or kill someone..) and the ability to PLAN AHEAD. Someone wants to know if we can grill out in two weeks? Why YES WE CAN! I cannot even imagine a life like that - it's been so many years of living for his job and around his schedule. We'll get to go to things TOGETHER. He'll have the ability to coach a baseball team or pick the kids up from school from time to time. Wow... life changing!!

The third hurdle - the longest we've battled. DEBT. This has been something we've been seriously focused on for a long time. We hit it really hard about two years ago, and super hard over the past year. We made incredible progress - I am still shocked that God gave us the ability to pay off the cards we did and make it to where we are today. SHOCKED. As far as we've made it, it still felt like we'd never get these stupid cards paid off. They're really holding us back from a lot right now. (like building that big house with a lot of bedrooms to fill with kids... you know.. little things..)

Clayton's dad mentioned to us, as he was working on our taxes (he's a CPA... and everyone should be so blessed as to have one so readily available!) that we should look into refinancing our mortgage to wrap in the remaining debt. We had looked into this option a couple of years ago, but we had SO much debt that the mortgage payment would have been so high that we'd have been in no better of a situation. Plus, we really felt like we had spent years getting ourselves into that mess and it seemed right for us to spend a long while digging out of it.

Now, we've worked our booties off, we've learned invaluable lessons from this journey, and we're ready to move on. So, we contacted our current mortgage company (after comparing with our credit union and local banks) to talk about what we could make happen. To our amazing surprise, it looks like we can totally be credit card debt free. And, our mortgage payment will still be laughably low. Holy moly... is this really real? Really? It's like manna from heaven! Not to mention that we might be able to use our tax refund to pay off our van.. or mostly. A girl could get excited here... after dealing with this mess for so many years.. could this really be the end of it?

So, yes. Sometimes you feel like you are never going to get out of the dark place in which you are resting. Sometimes the sadness, the pain, the stress... it feels like it's just going to take you under. But then... it doesn't. And then God stays faithful. He stays true to his word that he won't leave you. He shows you he wants good things for you. Maybe he feels we "learned our lesson" on the financial front. Maybe he knows that with Clayton being home more often we can be a double blessing to our own children and other children that will need it. I don't know his reasons but I am thankful!

It starts with finding the small, hard to spot blessings in our life sometimes for God to be able to take us out of our current attitude and situation and bring us up and out of them. If you're in a dark place today, please know that you are not alone, no matter how alone you feel. Know that there IS a brighter day coming. You can never truly appreciate the sunlight without a lot of dark and gloomy days. I can testify to this today!

Getting Out of Debt: Part 3

Back in the summer I posted about our journey to get out of debt. (here and here) We have stuck (pretty much) to our plan and have been consistently paying off credit cards. I am quite proud of the self control we've had! Sure, we could have done a bit better, but compared to where we were, we're rock stars!

We're still debt snowballing Dave-Ramsey-Style and we are seeing changes. Some days I feel really pumped up about where we've gotten, and others I feel so defeated at how far we still have to go. Right now we've pretty much reached the peek of that roller coaster. We just need a little shove to get up and over and we'll be smooth sailing! Amazingly, being so close to having another card paid off is more frustrating to me than exciting. I just wish I could pay it off TODAY. I don't want to make more payments. I don't want to wait. I'm tired of focusing on this darn card... be gone already! (and, for those thinking "umm.. hmm.. that's why WE don't have credit cards!" as you look down your noses... let's evaluate the car you can't afford to drive, the house you can't afford to live in, the other loans you can't pay back... most of us Americans are in this boat together - the boat of DEBT.)  Those of you that are rocking the debt-free (or mostly so) life.. you deserve a medal for your awesome choices!! Share your knowledge with the rest of us and keep us encouraged!

Once this card is paid off... we'll be able to whittle away at the next one a lot easier. It will just be a big weight off of our shoulders and we're so ready to get there. I'm working my booty off, as is Clayton. I keep telling God to keep doing what he's doing to help us out because we know that any money we are able to not only earn, but use towards "our" plan, is totally by his doing. He gives and takes away.. that is a hard lesson to learn sometimes. (at least for me!)

We are talking a lot more now about seriously looking for a house or land. I even went to get a survey of a piece of land we've been eyeing... things are starting to feel more real. Goals feel more reachable. Expanding my business on several acres seems possible. We're so close... so close it almost hurts!

One major setback is that Christmas is here. We've pretty much decided that Christmas will be fun but minimal this year. We refuse to ruin our long-term goals for one day of way too many presents under the tree. It just isn't worth it.

Another set back I see coming is medical bills. After some extensive testing I had done recently.. I'm dreading writing those checks! (that we'll have to pay out.. ugh.. taking away from the money we usually put towards paying off credit cards. Anyone else living this story?!)

So, we're still trucking along. We are determined. We have huge dreams that we know we can accomplish - and that keeps us motivated to just keep doing this. I can't believe it's been 6 months ago when we started this plan.. it seems like it was just a few weeks back. Time flies so fast.. whether you're making wise choices financially or not.

What choices will you make as the New Year approaches? Will you be where you are now 6 months from now or working on moving forward - refusing to let finances hold you back any longer? I'm praying that we'll be somewhere much different. Having a house that we've been able to sell, debt totally paid off, and a house on a perfect amount of acres. God is leading us... and his timing feels painfully slow. I do know that in the end, wherever he's put us will be perfect and I'll be so amazed at how he reveals his timing to us. That's how he works. I think he does it just to drive me crazy...

"Welcome Home!" Says the Mess

Oh yes, I am braving up and showing the entire world what I came home to this morning. This is quite typical for our household, if I can be frank. In the morning we spend our time talking, cooking, eating, getting dressed, fixing hair, packing lunches, and getting out of the door. There is just no time scheduled in for cleaning. That, my friends, is not on the roster until I arrive home, grocery sacks in hand.

In all honesty, on mornings that I know I have a big day ahead of me, or am tired from the previous busy day, coming home to a messy house feels like a ton of bricks being placed on my shoulders. I mean, it isn't like I can come home and ignore this disaster while I start on other projects. (my Type A personality just won't allow it.)

I've thought of having mandatory chore time before the kids leave for school in the mornings to make this challenge a bit less overwhelming for me... but it just doesn't work for us. That would require even earlier wake-up times, and they already have chores to do once they come home from being at school working all day. I'd rather their mornings be peaceful and relaxing.

So, I'm finally finding a groove of balancing working from home, being a mom, and keeping the house up. It's tough! This pictured room is one of the most visited places in our entire house, so I make it a priority in up-keep. I actually timed myself this morning to see how long it really takes me to clean up all of this junk - can you guess? From picking up to unloading and loading dishes, wiping counters, the table, and sweeping... drum roll please....... 15 minutes! If I wouldn't have had to sweep today, it probably would've been more like 10. That really isn't so bad, so I'm going to try to stop feeling so overwhelmed about it. Just get in, get it done, and move on with my day. Hope I've encouraged you to do the same!

Blog Makeover

If you think you've stumbled to the wrong place, don't fret - this is my blog, this is Peace and Craziness.. and it is currently experiencing Craziness. I am horrible with HTML and all of that jazz - so doing a small blog makeover is quite the feat for me. So, be patient, hang in there, and try not to be annoyed if I go through 35 different headers, fonts, colors, and layouts in the next few days. I promise to try to make this as painless as possible for all of us.

Kids and Money

In today's crazy economic times, it seems like we parents are very aware of teaching our children all about money. How to earn it, how to save it, and how to spend it. I feel very torn on so many issues surrounding kids and money:

Is allowance a good idea?

When should they have to spend their own money?

Should they only be allowed to save it?

Is it totally up to them how to use it?

From the top: ALLOWANCE

Our children do not receive allowance. Not a dime a day, not a quarter a week.. nothing. I know many families love their allowance system and it works so well for them - but I cannot imagine it for us. It just seems as though children SHOULD clean their rooms and help with house chores because that's what families do; they help each other. I don't want their motivation to be $$... so far so good. Everyone is expected to chip in and help and it goes smoothly. (well, minus Samuel who is hit or miss with clean-up time)

Having said that, recently we were staying at my mom and step dad's house. Papa went outside to do some yard work and the kids and I followed because they really needed to burn off some energy. Carter chose, all by himself, to help his papa pick up sticks and such in the yard rather than play like Madison. When we went inside a couple of hours later, Papa gave Carter $3 for his hard work. Carter's eyes totally lit up! He was SO proud of his earnings! I couldn't help but be so happy for him.. he had learned that hard work equals earning money. That's a good life lesson! (I was also proud of Papa's strength to not also give Madison and Sam $3 just to make it "fair" when only Carter had helped.)

Clayton followed that weekend up by giving each kid $1 each for helping pick up trash (that someones dogs had drug up in our yard.. can't imagine whose those would have been..) and they were all just giddy!

Then comes the dilemma. Will they always expect outside work or "extra" work to be paid jobs? Will their only motivation be money driven? This is not what I want for them... yet I do like them learning how to earn money.

Then, the second question. What happens with the money they earn?

Many parents cite "learning money management skills" as the main reason to give allowances to children on a regular basis. To help teach them about the 'real' world on a kid level.

If that's the goal, it seems to me that the children should have to use their own money to buy things they NEED.. not to save it all to buy fun stuff and things they want. If we gave allowance, I would expect my kids to chip in on things like school supplies.. or small items they could purchase. This would definitely teach them how far a dollar doesn't go. If they had anything left, then they could possibly treat themselves with something. Isn't that how the real world is? Wouldn't that be a realistic way to teach money management?

What do you think? Do you think it's okay to give allowance for daily chores or do you also worry this sends the wrong message about why everyone helps clean house? What do you expect your kids to do with any money they earn?

I'm torn... help me figure this issue out!

Getting Out of Debt Part 2

I posted this a little over a month ago, and boy that has been a tough month! I think I've entered the "I'm sick of this and I want to go shopping" phase of getting out of debt. Hmmph. This is hard.

This week, for example, Clayton has training in Little Rock so the kids and I decided to come up to see him. While he's in class all day, the kids and I are at my mom's... so close to Little Rock. So close to shopping, eating out, fun-fun-fun! Thankfully, Nana has a pretty fun house so we're busy here.. but I could really have a good time at Park Plaza right now...

Then, I remind myself of the land I want, the house I want, and all that jazz. Not gonna get it spending money on eating out and new clothes. (working on figuring out a method of shopping that somehow pays off debt...)

Clayton did take me out on the town last night with some good friends and we had a blast. I think it was what we both needed! It's kind of like when someone goes on an insane crash diet, eats way too little and never even has a taste of the junk food they really want, then they go nuts eating 3 times what they normally would have and gain back all of the weight they just lost. I figure as long as we just keep "tasting" spending money and avoid going nuts with it, we'll be able to keep this pace of paying off debt.

It's slow but steady. Every now and then I'll have an exceptionally good month with work and we'll be able to put more towards it, and boy that feels great! Typically, we just keep chopping away at it and hope that we'll get to our "we can look at houses now" goal sooner than later. Patience is a virtue that I tend to lack in this area. If there is anything that God can use to help us learn trust, patience, and contentment, it's paying off debt!!

Room Re-Do Part 2

My bestest friend Lee Ann came over today to help me tackle painting Madison's room! Thank God for good friends because, with Clayton away all week, I could have never done this job on my own! (without killing all of my children and losing my mind, that is.)

So, here are some pictures! The blue painters tape is still up, but the brown paint we chose, to match the pink and brown bedding that's being shipped to us, is all finished! I LOVE it and madison does too! I still need to paint Madison's closet doors white (they're primed and ready at least) and decorations are yet to be found - but this huge job is done! Scroll down a few post to remember what it looked like just a few days ago, vs. today! More pictures to come once it is totally finished.

Room Re-Do

This morning I got an insane urge to reorganize Madison's room. Her room has been EXACTLY the same since we bought our house 4 years ago. She's been begging to change her room, so I figured we'd at least toss out a lot of trash and old toys and move some furniture around. Mid-way through getting EVERYTHING out to sort, I figured I should really document this with photos!

Now, I must say that Madison's room is typically very clean. She's great about keeping everything put in its place. This disaster was totally ME. You know.. sometimes you have to create a mega mess in order to clean up!




This is the kids' 'game place.' They sit here and eat, drag every video game out, and play during down time. I HATE this space. This is a second closet in her room and we didn't need it for closet space, so we kinda just left it. We figured one day we'd turn it into something cute. I'm ready for that day!



Here is the 'sort of' after shot. I put her bed in the closet nuk and plan to paint the walls back there soon. First, Madison and I are going to pick out new bedding for her bed, then we'll paint the closet to match.

The new game area is where her bed was. My plan is to pick out bedding, and find a complementary color to the pink already on her walls to paint just under the chair rail. So, leave the top part pink, but change the bottom color. We'll see what we can come up with. I'm thinking some shade of green (not green-green... but a variety there of) to go with the pink. I'm seeing pink and green put together everywhere lately and am growing fond of it! With it being so in style, shouldn't be hard to find bedding to match! The all pink is sort of babyish... so my daughter has lately explained to me..

You should see how much stuff I took out of this room! We have a ton of really cute stuffed animals (like the big My Little Pony stuffed ponies) and other great toys that she NEVER played with. If anyone would like to take a peek, you are free to take ANYTHING YOU WANT for free! You, of course, could always give a donation to our dog rescue if you wanted, but no obligation. You'd be helping me just by taking it! I also have a lot of little girl books (even a potty training book for girls) that I'm giving away. Gotta get rid of some of this stuff. It's amazing what one child can accumulate in 8yrs of life!

It's fun to start a new project! Gotta get up the nerve to settle on a paint color and get that done. I'm NOT good with changes like that so wish me luck!

Getting Out of Debt

You cannot turn on the TV without hearing those four words today, can you? "Get Out of Debt!" Easier said than done, my friend!

Clayton and I have started on a long needed to be started journey called, "getting out of debt." Oh.. what fun! We have become Dave Ramsey psycho fans and are really excited about his "debt snowballing" plan. Simply put - you pay off your lowest balance of any debt you have first (be it credit card bills, car payment, medical bills, etc) and work your way up to the largest. In the process, you only pay the minimum payments on all other debt until you totally get rid of the cheapest balance.

So, we've been rolling quite well. We've managed to pay off three credit card bills in 2009 and are nicely kicking away at another. (why do we have so many? Bad choices a long time ago! Making up for it today, though!) We have finally gotten totally sick of giving credit card companies our money each month. When you really sit down and look at the checks you've written and exactly how much money you could be saving, investing, or giving INSTEAD of throwing them at never-ending credit card payments... well, it just becomes infuriating! So, we're determined to keep our money and do more Godly things with it in the future. Step one in doing that? Getting Out of Debt!

Paying off bills, in theory, is easy. You just do it. You buckle down, you don't do anything extra, you JUST pay off bills. No eating out, no vacations, no going and doing... just pay off that debt. As Dave Ramsey says, "Live like no one else so that you can live like no one else." Meaning, live like a poverty stricken person today so that you can live an amazing life later! Love that saying - hate applying it.

So far we've been doing pretty darn well. Some weeks we are super strict and get really excited about saving money - a few weeks later we're tired of saving money and decide to go out to eat or I decide to buy the kids all new summer shoes that, in honesty, they really don't "need." This is a balance I can live with, though.

We've decided to stay in our house, even though we could technically "afford" to move, in order to do what's right and pay off debt. That is so hard... some days I am totally content and feel amazingly blessed. The next day I'm annoyed that we only have one bathroom and I just want to be able to pee without someone banging on the door to "HURRY before I pee my pants!!" Today, thankfully, I am feeling very thankful that my house has a/c and floors and I'm not living in the Sudan Desert in a tent with dirt at my feet. It's all relative, isn't it?

One thing that really has me motivated lately to pay off debt is simply how much having debt hinders our ability to give what we'd like to. Dave Ramsey had a show and talked about his company's "profit sharing" lunches. They would pick a spot to eat, pray that God would send a needy Waiter to their table, and leave a $400 tip. They can give because they have no debt. They can give because they save money rather than buy all the things they want. I want to be that person. I want to be able to bless someone like that!

I used to only want money to have more money. To have more stuff and better stuff. To show the world, "Hey, look what we were able to buy!" Now.. I am so changed. I still love shopping, I still love going and doing, and my flesh cries for those things from time to time - and every now and then - I let myself do it. But, now, God is putting a burden on my heart to help those that need it. That he wants to be helped. That my family COULD help if only we were wiser with the money he has blessed us with. HIS MONEY. His money that we are simply here to manage. I refuse to be a poor manager of Christ's money anymore.

I may need to start a "money savers support group" in the next few months to make it through... any takers? ;) God is going to do amazing works if we just remain faithful to his plan.. I KNOW IT. He sure needs to help me stay faithful to it though, and stop temping me with all of the new summer fashions....

Spring Cleaning

It is soon to be summer, rather than spring, so I am a bit late out of the starting gate for Spring cleaning, but it's on my mind none-the-less.

Looking at the bedrooms in our home has been making me cringe. Even though they're fairly clean, picked-up, and organized, the amount of STUFF in each of them is getting a little over the top! Knowing that three birthdays in two months over the next few weeks is going to mean an accumulation of an abnormal amount of toys - it simply stresses me! (Carter's 5th birthday was May 1, a different post, a different day!)

So, what shall I do about this? A massive overhaul of each room is, unfortunately, necessary. My main problems:

1. What to do with old but good toys?
2. To keep or give away outgrown toddler clothes? (Clayton says no more kids but you never know!)
3. WHAT TO DO WITH ALL OF THE OLD BUT GOOD TOYS?!!

Most places do not want toys anymore... and I just cannot imagine throwing them away. What is a mom to do? I don't know a single soul that would welcome MORE toys into their already crowded toy bins. Any suggestions? What do you do when you're cleaning out your kids rooms and need to get rid of great toys that are just too young for them now? I'm contemplating just putting a table outside of my house, by the road, full of toys with a sign that reads "FREE TOYS!" I wonder if anyone would stop to grab a few things. I live out in the country so it isn't like our road is hopping with traffic... give me some ideas! I need an intervention!