Moms: You Just THINK You're Busy

I take care of three kids, one of which is home with me 24/7. I own my business and am the 'only' employee. I am your oh-so-typical soccer mom. I don't feed my kids fast food on busy days. (or that would be several days each week.) I clean. I do laundry. I'm pretty sure I'm the only person in this house that knows where the bathroom cleaner is located. I'm almost never alone, and the company tends to come with a whiney "Mooommmyyyy" voice. No... I'm probably not as busy as I think I am.

According to a new study (which was written about here) moms have 30-40 hours A WEEK of leisure time. Wow... that's incredible! Let me see if I can find at least a minute of it here... umm.. ?? Oh, wait, does this time right now count? Does having to stop your typing every 2 minutes on the second to fill a sippy cup, clean a spill, listen to crying about "I want candy!", and wipe a behind count as leisure time? Apparently, yes!

This is what one woman said in response to the news that she has so much free time:

Post reporter Brigid Schulte didn't believe it, and so she kept a diary of her days. What qualified as leisure time? Waiting for a tow truck, visiting a sick friend and answering e-mails at midnight. Basically, anything that couldn't be categorized as paid work, child care or housework is categorized by Robinson as "leisure."

*Robinson is the doctor that did the study

Apparently even having a root canal is leisure time - good to know.

Now, moms, don't get too upset because he says the same thing about dads and ALL Americans.

So, what do you think? How much leisure time do you have?

When we just had Madison, I had tons of leisure time. She was the BEST sleeper in the world. She always napped well, and I can remember the days when she was an infant and would take TWO 2-3 hour naps each day. One nap was for house cleaning; the other? Exercising, showering, WHATEVER. Life was good but I didn't know it.

Once we had our second angel... oh lordy! He was the WORST sleeper. He never slept. Husband gone to Troop School for 6 months, starting when baby #2 was 5 weeks old. I have never worked so hard in my entire life. I haven't since. I don't think I had 30 minutes of leisure time a week!

Fast forward to today. Three kids, two of which go to school, youngest at home is soon to be 3 years old. I could easily find all kinds of leisure time if this was all that was going on. Work does have to fit in here somewhere. And, the work I do is at my home, or I have to typically take Samuel with me if I'm required to work away. (and THAT'S fun.... let me tell ya) On days like today - when I've SCHEDULED leisure time.. sure! It's awesome, and I do schedule leisure time for myself and I think EVERYONE should.

On most days - where's the free time? Even if Samuel takes a nap (which he doesn't often anymore) then I spend that time calling clients, responding to emails, and bleaching the potty.. again. That's also when I hit training really hard with any dogs that are here for that purpose. Add in dance and ball practice and life's pretty busy. Don't get me wrong, I'm loving it! I enjoy it! But, I don't think you can classify it as leisure time if you're always waiting for some type of ridiculousness to occur. To me, leisure time is when you can go do what you want, be as loud as you want, and do whatever you want. I know that stay at home parents rarely have this going on - and I'd assume that those of you that have to go off to work realize your bosses wouldn't take too kindly to you just not showing up for a few hours so you can go to the spa.

What do you all think of this study? How much leisure time do you have each week and what's your definition of leisure?

Obama Care

I keep reading and rereading different articles to try to understand what this new Obama Care means for my family, and I end up just as clueless after sorting through a vast sea of numbers and estimates as I was before I dove in. 

I found this article from the AP that spelled some things out in a pretty direct way if anyone would like to take a look.

From what I gathered here - the richest people in America, as always, will be paying for everyone else's care. Thankfully this doesn't include me... but if I was one of those "richest people" I think I'd be pretty ticked that even more of my paycheck was being taxed. Isn't nearly half of it enough already?

I also think I discovered that my family doesn't really qualify for any real assistance... surprise surprise.

Medicaid is being expanded to cover more people, senior citizens will have cuts in costs of their medications (which seems like a really good idea!!) and there apparently will be incentives for small business owners that have fewer than 25 employees that decide to offer health insurance.

My only concerns are:

- Do I get to keep my insurance plan? Will MY insurance rates increase to cover all of this other stuff? Since my family is middle class, will we still not qualify for any help with medical bills or medications yet eventually have to pay more to get care and meds? Someone HAS to pay for this stuff.... and it's hard for me to believe that only those making $200,000 a year or more will single-handedly cover the cost of this "free" health care.

- Will my taxes increase? I've heard some talk on the news that eventually they will have to install a new Federal tax on everyone to cover the cost... of course this is just speculation, but when you look at the high taxes Canada pays (from what I could dig up they pay about 10% or more in taxes than we do) then one has to wonder. Will my tax rate skyrocket and I still not qualify for this new awesome insurance plan because "we make too much."?

I've heard many of my friends joke that they'll soon be quitting their jobs because they'd make more a month if the government simply took care of them. Sad.. but it seems to be becoming a reality. What's the incentive to make it in the world if there are hand-outs to EVERYONE. I'm so torn on this issue.

On one hand, I really do want everyone to have quality health care. I want everyone to be able to afford to go to the doctor and buy their medications. I want that for MY family. Can I tell you the times we've stressed because everyone in the house was sick, and everyone needed medications, but first the doctor has to test you to make sure, which means a co-pay for each person seen? We've dropped well over a hundred dollars in one day's time just because we needed a simple antibiotic. The times that we needed more than your regular Amox... my goodness. That's with our GOOD insurance.. I don't know how others, that make the same as we do, are making it with their plans. I really don't. Will there be help for THEM?

This post is really more a list of questions I have - not my bashing of this plan. I can't truly bash it because I STILL don't understand it. If you do, give the rest of us an idea, please! Are you for this or against it and why?

School to Moms: No more PJ's!

A school in England is telling moms to stop dressing down when bringing kids to school. No PJ's! You can read a bit about that here.

Basically, after witnessing 50 mothers bring their children to school "not properly dressed" the school's principal felt compelled to send a letter home to instruct parents to wear proper attire when dropping kids off in the mornings. He said,

“People don’t go to see a lawyer, bank manager or doctor dressed in pajamas, so why do they think it’s okay to drop their children off at school dressed like that?”

 My question is, "How does he know how I dress to go to the doctor or to the bank?"

Now, I see his point. I do try to put on a pair of jeans and at least a decent shirt to drop my kids off at school each  morning. Seeing that I'm one of the fortunate few that doesn't have to be "at work" first thing in the morning, I take full advantage of that. My hair will be in a ponytail and if I find time to throw on some powder and mascara; consider yourself lucky. Perhaps as my youngest child gets older, I'll find more time to get ready needlessly each morning to simply drop my kids off and come home and work on the computer or train dogs all day. Let's not forget the proper clothing required to mop juice off of the floor and clean bathtubs...

I could see this argument if parents were sending their kids to school inappropriately dressed. I do think that getting up and putting on 'real' clothes can set a better pace for the day.. for me it signals "okay, lazy time is over - time to get to work!" However, if I choose to look like a slob when I drop my kids off at school... what's it to ya? Maybe my everyday clothes just LOOK like PJs? I know my dog walking clothes can certainly resemble clothes I might wear to lounge around the house. A long-sleeved tee, yoga pants, and tennis shoes. (and of course, the ponytail.) For what I'm doing after dropping kids off, that IS appropriate.

What do you think? Should a school be able to dictate how PARENTS look when dropping kids off at school?

Take Care of Your Own First?

I was reading a short article about the orphaned Haitian children being brought to the USA for care and possibly being adopted by American families when I became shockingly aware of the controversy surrounding this ordeal.

I was completely floored when reading the comments to the article. Many apparently feel that Americans need to only take care of American orphans. "Take care of your own" as one lovely commenter put it. Our own? What does this mean? Does that mean as a white family my family should only ever foster or adopt white children? Does it mean we should only take in children from Arkansas? From our city? "Our own.." something about this just makes me ill. We are all God's children and therefore we are all responcible for each other.

One thing that people don't often realize is there is a huge difference in the way orphans are treated here in the states verses third world countries. (not that things are perfect here.. perfect would be no such thing as an orphan b/c so many families are trying to help them.) Much less when that country is rocked to shambles and there is no food, water, or shelter. Bring those babies here!

I do understand the general idea of what they are saying, though. I've heard many people wonder why people choose to adopt internationally when there are so many children here in need of homes. My best answer, though never having walked in those shoes, would be b/c of what I mentioned above. They probably learn about the horrid conditions of the orphanages in other places and feel God telling them to act. To help.

I just find it a little bit appalling  that anyone would have a problem with children being helped by Americans. This may be a great way to spread God's word to children that possibly would not have heard it otherwise. This could start a great movement of love. Who knows what God is using this for, and using America for in this eve of such destruction.

Am I blinded by ideology? Should we only be focused on the children without homes in America?

Congo Women - Most Brutilized Victims of War

Picture this scenario:

You're sitting in your home, making lunch, chatting with your children, and going on with daily life as you know it. Suddenly you hear a commotion outside and your front door slams open. Six men armed with guns, machetes, and knives storm into your home. Your children scream and cry. They grab you. They hold you down, and all six of them take turns brutally raping you as your family watches. When they finish they try to force your own little brother to also rape you and stab him to death when he refuses. He is only six years old. When they leave you are kidnapped and raped every day for 8 months by them, you become pregnant with one of their children, and you have no idea if your own children are dead or alive. Finally you get away, return home and find your children are alive, but are shunned because you have been violated. Your family, friends, and your entire city avoid you like the plague because of what happened to you. Now what?

Is this tough to read? Imagine living it.

Every single day women in the Congo are raped, kidnapped, and murdered as the country sits back and watches. Rape is the weapon of choice used by the angry and power-hungry men in the area as they try to gain control of everyone in every village. The rape is so brutal that many women lose control of bodily functions afterwards (due to permanent damage that only surgery can correct), or they die from subsequent infections.

When they are known to have been raped the woman's family often casts her away and it is not uncommon for these same women to starve to death due to having no one to turn to, and no where to go. Women in the Congo are said to be more likely to be raped than to learn how to read. Can you imagine living this hell?

It isn't just women that suffer this fate. Children as young as 3 are enduring the same horrific life. Rape is now spreading to men to force the fear even farther into the society. Now that it's happening to men... maybe something will be done to stop it.

These issues are real. These issues are happening TODAY. The more I read about it, see about it, and learn about it, the more I think, "We must do SOMETHING."

America can get a really bad rep from other countries, but there is no other nation in the world that gives as much as we do. Not we as in our government, but we as individuals that ban together for a cause. Americans are by nature humanitarians. We love people and we cannot bear to see suffering occur.

Sometimes this lack of being able to handle how sad and upset knowing about other's suffering makes us, we turn away. We bury our heads. We say "that's so horrible.. I can't read anymore of it!" This is NOT how problems get solved. This is NOT how women with no hope find help. This is NOT what you would want others to do if you were that African woman, victimized, brutalized, starving to death, and likely now infected with HIV.

With everything I've been reading on this topic, one group keeps showing up again and again. Women for Women. They help these women that have no hope and they teach them skills to help them make money. They teach them to read. They make life possible for them. If possible, I highly encourage everyone to support their cause with donations. If you're unable to provide monetary support, please provide PRAYER support. God loves these people and I personally know the power of prayer to be truly amazing. Dedicate time each day to have focused prayer time for not just the women, but the people in the Congo and in Africa as a whole. That their hearts will change, that women will be seen as equals to men, that children will have the same rights as everyone else.

Last but not least, EDUCATE YOURSELF. Your own home, your own family, your own church, and your own friends are not what make this world go round. God created us to worship him and to love each other. Though they are not near us in geography, according to God's word they ARE our neighbors. They are our brothers and sisters in Christ. Will you at least read this story (by Anderson Cooper and CBS News) and see if God tugs on your heart to do something? Maybe he will, maybe he won't. But, don't hide... it is there and it is happening whether we ignore it or not.

Merry Chris.... umm.. Happy Holidays!

Another wonderful Christmas day is approaching, and stores are full of lights, ornaments, decorations, ribbon, trees, and cheer. One thing you might find missing more and more is the actual word "Christmas." Apparently, we are simply celebrating the "holidays"... which are apparently code for "we don't want to offend anyone by saying Christmas..shhh.."

News story after news story, both online and on TV, I keep reading all kinds of insanity about Christmas bans. Bans on "Christmas" parties at school. Bans on "Christmas" music at "holiday concerts." Bans on nativity scenes, baby Jesus, or posters of pregnant virgins. (okay.. you know the one I'm talking about)

Has the world gone mad? What is all the commotion about?

This story talks all about a school district banning any religious Christmas music from being sang at a Christmas concert. Umm.. yes... a Christmas concert. If Christmas music offends you or your kid... DON'T GO. Much simpler solution than putting an actual BAN on "Silent Night." Like it or not, December 25th is a celebration of the birth of Jesus by the 80ish percent of Americans that say they are Christian. That's most of us.. meaning most of us enjoy singing "O Holy Night."

How about this story where one woman is causing chaos by demanding all religious symbols be taken down from the town square during Christmas. What's even crappier than the war she's waging, is that cities across the great USA are so afraid of being sued by these rare fruit-cakes that they're taking things down WITHOUT A FIGHT! So, everyone but one or two people in your town WANT religious Christmas symbols.. and you cater to the two? I know that in certain times, the law is there to PROTECT the minorities... but what exactly do they need protection from in this instance? How does seeing a nativity scene damage someone? How do the words "Merry  Christmas" actually offend a person? I see less outrage over rap music - which typically offends EVERYONE! Let's get with the program folks.. pick your battles!

 If "we" try to force you to have a Christmas Tree with a shiny star on top and make your child learn about the birth of Christ in public school.. fine.. have a tantrum over that. Not the case. So chill a bit. You don't see me trying to sue our schools b/c they talk about Santa - though we choose NOT to do Santa at our home. I mean.. he's for sure not real! Don't try to convince my kid that Santa is a God-like being that sees him constantly and rewards his good behavior with gifts and treasures and scolds bad behavior with no goodies at all, but lumps of coal instead. Still, I'm NOT offended by Santa.. I just choose to do as I please at my home.

I'm a Christian but wouldn't be offended by someone saying "Happy Hanukah" to me. I mean.. if that's their religious view of choice, then great! I'm honored they want to include me - though it isn't something I celebrate. Thanks for the holiday cheer, Jewish Friend! :) You want to put up a menorah? Fine by me!

There is a friend to those that enjoy Christmas - the Wish Me A Merry Christmas Campaign is a really cool thing going on. On the site I linked you can see tons of news stories that deal with both victories for  Christians in this insane war we're fighting, and some issues that are ongoing.

Like it or not, Christmas is a FEDERAL holiday. Our kids get out of school in honor of it, you get off of work because of it. That alone should make you celebrate and have Christmas cheer! Let's stand up for what we believe in and not let the government or a few loony toons take the lights off of our streets or the nativity scenes from our town squares. Don't believe that your love of Christ and the one day a year we have a major public celebration in his honor is offensive, wrong, or intolerant. The few that try to ban us from this celebration are the intolerant ones. They are the offensive ones. The law isn't there to protect us FROM religion.. but to protect religion FROM government. Let's keep this straight America!

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

Fattest States in America

I heard a news report on the radio this morning that mentioned the fattest, and fittest, states in America. What a shocker! As usual, our good ole southern states are overall the most unhealthy and the most obese. *that's an award I could do without* The fattest state of all, again, was Mississippi. This is the fifth year in a row this state has miserably failed in this area, with 32.5% of adults being obese. (I take the report to mean that this percentage doesn't even calculate people that are simply overweight.)

My home state, Arkansas, was #10 in having the most obese adults. According to this report:

Washington, D.C., July 1, 2009 - Arkansas has the 10th highest rate of adult obesity in the nation, at 28.6 percent and the second highest of overweight youths (ages 10-17) at 37.5 percent, according to a new report by Trust for America's Health (TFAH) and the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation (RWJF).

To see how your state ranks, check here.

Colorado is, once again, the #1 fittest state. Go Buffaloes! Only 18.9% of their adults are obese. You guys should be proud! (notice the "you guys" and not y'all...) I have family up and over that way, and yes, they look great! I don't see how with  Aunt Gena's cooking.. but they do.

This makes me wonder, "What do they got that we ain't got?" in good CO? Besides mountains, hiking trails, bike paths everywhere, and leaders of their state that give a hoo about health and fitness... oh wait... maybe that's it?

I look around my city, that I do love, and shake my head. As many families as we have here - there is almost nothing here to cater to us. Our city park is okay, but the "walking trail" is a big joke. It's way too narrow, it floods in parts, and it isn't smooth in the least. No way can kids safely bike or roller blade there... much less adults. 

Our one really nice track is open to the public but is property of the school district. No wheels of any kind (no strollers, bikes, wagons, skates, etc) and no pets. So, if you want to walk your dog - not there. If you want to push your stroller on a non-flooded, smooth surface - sorry. Some of our busiest streets have incomplete or no sidewalks. The options are pretty much drive or get run over. You pick.

It's really no wonder we southerners are at a huge disadvantage when it comes to competitions of health and fitness.

Fast food here is pretty much your typical circle of grease on a bun. Fast-food companies have tried to trick us into thinking they care about healthy by including salads on their menus - but have you taken the time to look at the nutrition labels? Most of them are WORSE than ordering yourself a box of happiness like your kids.

Food prices are insane right now. The poorest of people suffer the most here.

The Government LOVES being in the middle of everything.. but they haven't yet figured out a way for food stamps to not cover Hot Pockets and other foods that are full of fat, calories, and offer almost nothing in the way of nutrition? Wouldn't showing people that the Government supports "these" healthy foods likely go a long way in helping people learn about the better choices? It isn't always easy to pick the right foods! Where's the support and direction?

Now that I've taken some time to blame Big Brother for our fatness... let's take another minute to put the blame back on ourselves.

Yes, food prices are crazy - but fresh fruits and veggies really still are not that expensive. Bananas, apples, celery, carrots, cucumbers, fresh green beans, and lettuce are pretty darn cheap. I can buy organic celery for less than I can buy each of my kids a candy at the check-out line. Spending my money on produce means I avoid buying pre-made or packaged foods like frozen pizzas, chicken nuggets, and any other microwavable meals. It's a trade-off.

 Am I the only one that thinks all of the constant talk about why we're all so fat is just talk? Where's the ACTION? What's really being done to stop this epidemic? Where's the public fear of our children dying at much younger ages than any generation before due to unhealthy weight and eating? Where is the realization that this is a very serious problem and it hits us not just on the health front, but the financial front as well with skyrocketing insurance costs?

Is it really the Governments responcibility at all to make us be healthy - or are we passing the buck to avoid taking the blame ourselves?

Curtis Vance - GUILTY

Our beloved news anchor, Anne Pressly was horribly  murdered last year, and today we celebrate a conviction of the perpetrator. You can read about that here.

This post isn't to rehash the horridness of this crime. I was inspired to post about this because of all of the amazing things people were calling into radio stations to say about Anne. I personally did not know her, but I've yet to hear even one negative remark about her as both a professional and as a friend and person.

She was outwardly stunning... and obviously just as gorgeous in her soul. It was so touching to hear the outpouring of love and support to her memory and to her family as they still grieve their loss.

It's times like these that I stop and think about what my own legacy is. How will people remember me when I die? Of course I hope to live to be 140 years old, but even if I died today - what would people remember? I don't think this to be morbid, rather to inspire myself to always seek God for what I should do each day. I know that if I follow him - I'll be doing the right thing. Wouldn't it be AMAZING to be remembered for nothing other than being an amazing Christian? Not for the "works" you do on earth, but for the spiritual connection you had with your Father?

I think of people that I've loved that have passed and the way I remember them. From my aunt that passed at just 39 years of age that I loved (and still love) so dearly... to my grandmother that passed shortly before that.. to my husband's grandmother that passed several months ago. I can recall so many wonderful things about each of them. Isn't it funny how in death someone almost immediately  morphs into a perfect being in your mind. All wrong they ever did can just disappear in your grief. Have you ever been to a funeral where someone stood up and said,

"Well, he got what he deserved and the world's a better place without his crummy attitude. Rest in peace friend."

Hopefully not.

I suppose a sad truth is that we can really search to find something good in anyone once they've left this earth... why can't we do that while they're still here? What would our cities look like if every single person just went out each day with one goal: Find good in everyone! Can you imagine the love, support, and encouragement that would occur? Wow.. it would change everything! What if all parents did that with their children? Teachers with their students? Husbands with their wives?

What would happen?

Sex Offenders - What Should Happen to Them?

When looking over some online news this morning, I stumbled across this horrible story.

A registered sex offender, that previously has spent 15 years in prison for choking and raping a woman back in 1989, is now responcible for this:

Investigators trying to identify six bodies found in the home of a convicted rapist in Cleveland are focusing the inquiry on eight or nine missing women.

You really have to read the entire story to grasp how horrible this really is. I mean.. talk about evil walking on earth - this man is it!

Everytime I read a story like this, I always scroll down to the last couple of paragraphs to see if the phrase "a registered sex offender" appears. Most of the time, it does.

How many women have to be brutalized, how many children molested and raped, how many people horribly hurt by sex offenders for our justice system to get the point: THEY CANNOT BE CHANGED. Show me ONE case of a serious sex offender getting caught, getting let go, and NOT repeating the crime. Maybe they're smarter the next time, maybe they learn not to get caught, but when people are true pedofiles or rapists, they just are. Period. End of story. No second chances.

Typically, this is the exact opposite of what I believe. I know that God forgives and that God can change anyone. However, I just don't think that, in the name of keeping people safe, these people should be given chance after chance to prove themselves changeable. If an adult brutalized a child - why is this not considered such a haneous crime that they are locked away for life? I know that issues of rape between adults are not always black and white, but if it is found that a man rapes a woman - and it is a black and white issue - how many chances should he be given in the future to rape more?

This just sends me into a rage. Time after time, these people are let out to simply do the exact same crimes they were put in prison for - and often times when they are released they are even more unstable than when they were first locked up. Notice how this guy went from "just" a rapist to now a serial killer/rapist.

Do people think that prison somehow reforms these truly insane people? Do they think they're receiving intense therapy while they are locked in a cell 23 hours a day? Even with therapy, does the public understand the almost non-existant success rate with rehabilitating sex offenders?

Am I the only person in  America truly outraged with this? Why is more not being done?

Fatigued Pilots - What Should be Done?

If you've been watching the news lately, one hot topic is mentioned at least once an hour: Pilot Fatigue.

This is an issue I actually never gave much thought. I, like many people in the world, assumed that proper restrictions were currently in place to keep plane crashes from occuring from preventable circumstances... you know.. like the pilot FALLING ASLEEP! Apparently, I was wrong.

This article on CNN's webiste says,

In the last 16 years, fatigue has been associated with 250 fatalities in air carrier accidents, Robert Sumwalt, NTSB vice chairman, said at an FAA symposium in July.

Well, doesn't that make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside?

Now the FAA is said to be trying to change the current allowed flight hours and the required amount of resting time between flights in hopes of preventing things like this happening in the future. Seeing as how they regulations have remained the same since the 1940's... I say it's well past due.

One request I've heard mentioned by the people in the airline biz is to simply allow pilots to nap in the cockpit during flights. Now, don't freak out... the truth is, pilots are already sleeping during your flight and you just don't know it. (according to about 80% of pilots that admit to sleeping during flights.) Wouldn't it be better to simply put safety policies in place so that this much needed sleep can occur SAFELY?

Other than take-off and touch-down... pilots say that the rest of the flight is almost always simply auto-pilot. If there are two pilots in charge.. why not let them take turns getting some Zzz's? If it means safer landings after 8 hours in the air... I say YES!

If letting them rest on the plane isn't a valid option, what other options are there?

Pregnancy: What the Books Won't Tell You

For all of my preggo friends and readers - this one's for you! The good, the bad, and the ugly of pregnancy through my eyes.

Let's start from the beginning - Before You Conceive.

First off - no one ever told me that when you don't want to become pregnant you are basically the most fertile person on earth. Then, when you're ultra ready to add another addition to your family, you can suffer from infertility. Who'd a thunk it, right? Yep.. it can happen. If it happens to you, take heart that you are not alone. There are so many women that have struggled and are struggling to become pregnant. Find those women via message boards, through friends of friends, through blogs... anyway you can. FIND THEM. Share your struggle with them, find people that truly understand the roller coaster ride of infertility because you will need them.

Then comes the question - Could I be pregnant? What are the symptoms?

Pregnancy symptoms vary so vastly from woman to woman... the typical symptoms books will list include things like tender breasts and menstrual type cramping. Of course, the missed period.

No book I ever read told me that the "menstrual type cramps" could be much, much worse than typical cramps. Before I was even expecting my period I would have horrid cramping, mainly in my lower back. Let's not forget the bloating... oh joy. Even before those symptoms, for me, was the super sore breasts. Yowzers! Tingles, stabbing pains, even sore armpits... this was always the first sign for me.

Finally, you pee on a stick and - BAM! You're pregnant! CONGRATULATIONS! Now what?

Well, again, this will vary from woman to woman. For THIS woman.. a timeline for the first trimester went something like this:

Week 4 - find out I'm pregnant - super excited, scared, in love, anxious... bloated, cramping, sore breasts.
Week 5 - Same symptoms but add in a bit of queesyness from time to time
Week 6 - Vomitting has hit. Throwing up at least twice a day - every day. Food is gross. I feel gross. "Why did I do this again?" - Also, psycho Mandy takes over. The hormones grip my brain and make me an irrational, angry, sad, or extremely happy person. Alternate these emotions over and over each day.
Week 7-12 - Throwing up so much that I'm blacking out from low blood sugar and dehydration. Getting put on meds to avoid going into the hospital. Meds work some... now only throwing up a few times a day again.

What a fun first trimester, right? Actually.. there were some pretty cool things that happened for me each time in those first three months. Namely - first doctor's appointment! First ultrasound to see that sweet little gummy bear, and best of all, seeing that beating heart. Instant love.  For pregnancy #2 and #3, the first trimester also included outgrowing my pants from my ever expanding belly. Yes, you really do show much faster the second + time. (and you show faster with each pregnancy.. from my experience.)

Enter the Second Trimester

Week 13 - The first pregnancy I expected to wake up feeling like a miracle had happened over night. All of the books say that morning sickness typically leaves by this week. So, why am I still puking constantly?
Week 14-16 - Still sick.. seriously? Yep... it happens. (all three times for me) By week 16 I can swear that I feel little tickles of baby movements. Too early to tell.
Week 16-20 - Definitely begin to feel baby movements! This makes all of the throwing up worth it! Still throwing up.. just to keep you updated. Psycho Mandy still ever present... though not quite as bad as a few weeks back. Husband probably glad to not have his wife be so crazy quite as often. Oh, cool stuff around this time - maternity clothes finally fit! I look pregnant and not fat! Hooray! Also, week 20 I get to find out the sex! Time to buy the first blue or pink outfit! I cry when I get it home and reality hits... "Precious one, you will be here soon, God willing."
Week 21-24 - Feeling super cute with my little belly. Loving baby motions. Not puking nearly as often.. sometimes only a few times a week now. Ahh.. this is why I loved being pregnant! For this period of time! Others can feel baby kicks now and when you have older kids, they really begin to bond with the little tyke. The fight over baby names is probably still on-going.
Week 24-28 - Still feeling great! Getting larger, trying not to waddle "already." Baby movements are huge now. "I swear I saw a foot stick out by my rib cage!" Husband is amazed at the alien-type activity he can feel through my skin. "Does that hurt?!" - I don't think I've thrown up this month... wow! New aggrivation has arrived... enter: Sciatic Nerve Pain. Oh yes.. I'd rather be puking.

The Third Trimester

Week 28-32 - Still feeling sort of cute and very obviously pregnant. Getting uncomfortable and wondering how I'll make it until the end. Sciatic Nerve Pain makes walking, sitting, lying down, and sleeping impossible. Those expensive maternity pillows you buy do help.. some. No more than folding your own pillows between your knees. Husband is slowly being pushed out of the king-sized bed by the fluff surrounding me. Also, my 7-step flip over, eight times a night, makes sleep impossible for both of us. "Why did I do this again?" The good news is, all of the being awake gives us plenty of time to finally decide on a name. It also gives me ample amounts of time to empty my bladder, again. And again. And.. again.
Week 32-36 - Okay... why am I puking again? Why is his foot hitting me down "there" and why does his rear have to be jammed directly inside my ribs 24/7? Baby... please change position! On the flip side - baby  moves regularly... super fun! Time for baby showers, organzing the nursery, cleaning the entire house like an insane person, and spending all of my time in baby-dreamland. All I can think of is the baby and the future.
Week 36-40 - I'm done. DONE. DONE! "Oh God, why did I do this?!!" I can't move. I can't breathe. I hurt from head to toe. I'm throwing up again which really makes that lovely sciatic nerve pain flare up. I love the baby more than ever and the anticipation to meet him or her is truly maddening. Due to this anticipation and pain - Psycho Mandy is in full swing. I will cry for any reason, I will yell for no reason, and I don't want to hear "It's just your hormones!" In my nine month pregnant brain, it is indeed 'you' that's causing the problem.. not the hormones. "I'm fine!"

Birth Day - With my first I went into labor a few days before my due date. No one told me that a first baby can take DAYS of labor to deliver. I never could have imagined such intense pain, for sooo many hours, with no relief. "This is crazy.. why am I doing this?" No one told me that you could go all natural for DAYS, dialate to 8cm, think you're soon to push, only to be told your baby's heartbeat is much too slow and you need an emergency csection. "That's just great..."

No one told me that having a csection is about 8 million times scarier than being in labor. Amazingly, once you accept the reality and just focus on your baby's birth, it's not so bad.

Not one of the books I had described what it was like to feel people inside of your belly, tugging, pulling, pushing... how it smells when they burn the skin to stop bleeding. What an experience. No friends of mine ever told me that my husband would be the amazing rock that stopped my fearful tears and got me through.

Finally, no one could have possibly warned me what I would feel when I first saw my baby. That first glimpse when they're still a weird shade of purplish-blue. Before the oxygen fills their lungs. When they're still all messy from the womb. Only a mother's eyes could see that little wet, messy, blue being and sob with love and joy. Only a mother could reach out anxious to touch, smell, kiss, and hold her baby - mess and all.

The most shocking thing about pregnancy to me has always been how the baby's birth makes many women ready to do it all over again. No matter how horrible you feel, or for how long, often times women MUST do it more than once. If this sounds insane to you, you're likely in your first or third trimester of pregnancy. Don't worry - you'll soon discover the same thing mothers before you have been discovering since the beginning of time.

Soon to come: Post Partum - What You Should REALLY Expect

White House Tries to Exclude Fox News from Interview

The plot thickens! Obama is soon to really sink himself with any conservatives that are left on his side with these antics.

I can't possibly write this as well as Fox has done, so here is a small portion of the full report.

The Obama administration on Thursday failed in its attempt to manipulate other news networks into isolating and excluding Fox News, as Republicans on Capitol Hill stepped up their criticism of the hardball tactics employed by the White House.

The pushback came after White House senior adviser David Axelrod told ABC News' "This Week" on Sunday that Fox News is not a real news organization and other news networks "ought not to treat them that way."




Media analysts cheered the decision to boycott the Feinberg interview unless Fox News was included, saying the administration's gambit was taking its feud with Fox News too far. President Obama has already declined to go on "Fox News Sunday," even while appearing on the other Sunday shows.

Thankfully, the other networks all decided that they would send none of their reporters if Fox News wasn't also there.

Wow, is this really happening? When did we begin our loss of Freedom of the Press? I am still in America... right?

Even if you are not a Fox News fan (which is pretty unlikely if you like my blog.. but welcome aboard anyway, if not!) this should be very concerning and outrageous to you! When the President and his goonies begin deciding what stations are worthy of reporting news - we are in big trouble!

I, personally, find this extremely offensive! Does the President not realize that the MAJORITY of Americans watch Fox News? The MAJORITY of Americans are conservatives (not necessarily right-winged all the way, but definitely not liberal) and many of Fox's shows (such as my favorite, hosted by Mr. O'Reilly) are ranked NUMBER ONE amongst all other national media? Americans trust Fox News for the most part.. and for the White House's Senior Advisor to say that Fox isn't a "real" news organization is incredibly insulting to the majority of Americans that turn to them daily for news.

I believe that most news organizations report true news... they just put their own spin on it to make the people look good that they support. I have no doubt that Fox could do these same things, but being that I like the people that they like, it works out for me.
Well, America, you wanted change. Change is what you're getting! It is definitely not change I can believe in...

Balloon Boy's Flight Just a Hoax?

Is there a bigger, or more bizarre story, right now than the "Balloon Boy"? If you've been living in a cave over the past week, here's the quick run-down.

Richard and Mayumi Heene claimed that their six-year-old son, Falcon, had climbed into a basket attached to a giant helium balloon that they created in their yard. When the balloon was to be inflated, it was supposed to be tethered, to avoid lift-off. Instead, it went soaring into the air. The Heene family claimed that they thought the little boy was being lifted off with the balloon, and went into total parental freak-out mode. (as would I...)

After authorities, and even the National Guard, were called in to help search for this poor child, and the balloon finally slowly drifted to the ground - no Falcon was to be found. No Falcon, and no basket attached to the balloon. Now the questions got more intense, "Did he fall out?" "Did we miss the basket falling away from the balloon?" "Where is he?!"

Long story short - he was found hiding in the garage at his house.. safe and sound. He had never been in any danger. At first this was a cause for serious celebration! Now, it is being called a huge scandal. Authorities are claiming that evidence suggests that the family planned the entire ordeal as a way of gaining media attention, in hopes of helping themselves get a reality show of their own.

"It has been determined that this is a hoax. We believe we have evidence at this point to indicate that this was a publicity stunt," Alderden told reporters. FOX News

Wow... would someone REALLY do such a thing? The family claims that they are not lying, but authorities are claiming to have factual evidence to suggest otherwise. I suppose only time will tell.

What do you think? Is this a family that is just purely motivated by publicity, or have they been wrongly accused over a truly horrifying event in their lives?

Read the complete story at Fox News.

Most Sensitive Pregnancy Tests

With my expansion of readership, I've gotten several messages saying that I'm neglecting my many friends that are trying to conceive or are currently pregnant. Yes, I must admit that I have! When you're no longer in that phase yourself, it is hard to write on such topics. I asked them all to give me what they'd love for me to blog about - and I was excited to hear that a lot of the info they want is factual. Mainly - PREGNANCY TEST INFORMATION. I vividly recall reading everything I could get my hands on about pregnancy tests when trying to conceive Samuel, so, I will happily share what I have learned over my own infertility struggle with anyone that finds themself in the same boat.

Let's keep this pretty simple. You want to know: What is the most sensitive pregnancy test on the market? The answer might surprise you!

One of the most sensitive tests available in the USA comes in a simple box in a store that many children love. The $Tree. Oh yes... that cheap looking $1 pregnancy test behind the counter is said to be a highly sensitive brand. Some tests show it to measure as little as 17mIU (mIU = thousandths of International Units). When testing early and often, those $Tree tests become a baby-obsessed girl's best friend!

Amazingly, the Dollar Store's brand of pregnancy test also ranks as another of the most sensitive measuring around 20mIU. Another great deal - another great pregnancy test.

If you're okay with spending more, First Responce Early Result test claims to measure as little as 15mIU.. but may need as much as 25mIU to detect pregnancy.

Most of the well known tests turn positive with 25+ mIU. Brands such as:

Target Brand - 25mIU
Walgreens +/- - 25mIU
Fact Plus - 25mIU
Equate - 25mIU
EPT - 25mIU
Cearblue Easy - 25mIU
Answer - 25mIU

My pregnancy test of choice was always $tree. Cheap and accurate. The only downside with cheaper tests, from personal experience, is there is an increased chance for evaporation lines. (dull colored lines that appear in the positive section of a pregnancy test - typically occur well after the recommended "reading" time.)

One downfall that some of my online TTC friends have encountered with the very sensitive tests is detecting a pregnancy very early, only to have it end in a very early miscarriage. Often times a miscarriage can occur so early that a woman would have never known she was pregnant at all. This can lead to a lot of emotional stress - so choose wisely how much you really want to know when seeking out the appropriate test for your situation. Many of these sensitive tests might detect pregnancy a few days before your period is even late.

If you have your own pregnancy test advice to share, drop it in the comments section. Many women will read this and you never know who it might help. Happy testing!

16 and Pregnant

Some of you have probably seen this intriguing new show on MTV, 16 and Pregnant. The name tells it all. The show is all about teen couples (or at least the girls) that find themselves young and expecting and the trials they go through in deciding, "what's next?"

Today I finally got to watch an episode I had missed last week. It featured two really stand-up teens that decided adoption was the best choice for their baby girl. Watching them struggle with their decision and decide to go through with giving their newborn to their chosen couple at the end was a huge mixture of heart-wrenching pain and joy. Pain for obvious reasons. The biological mom and dad had immense grief after their daughter was born and they physically handed her to the adoptive parents. I cried with them; I cried for them. My heart broke into a million pieces putting myself into those shoes.

Joy came, as well. Joy for the adoptive parents. They had been trying for their own children for years with no success and now they were being given the most amazing gift they could ever receive. To see them snuggle that baby girl and look at her with such amazement... truly wonderful!

Joy also for another reason. Here were these two "young kids" dealing with a huge adult decision. They were both mature enough to see that they could not offer their daughter the life they so much wanted her to have. With unstable families on both sides, they knew they had little resources to draw from if they were to keep her. Though it so obviously broke them inside to let her go - it made my heart fill up to see them do such a selfless act in order to provide for their child in the best way they knew how.

The last reason I loved this episode is because I pray it brings HOPE. Hope to a young girl that finds herself pregnant and is weighing all of her options. Hope that seeing this couple nurture this baby while she was inside of her mother and then continue nurturing her by giving her to a loving home will help another teen mom choose life and adoption. Hope that the choice of adoption will more often be spoken of and considered by those unready to raise a child.

Teen pregnancy is such a platform issue for me being a teen mother once myself. Now that my own children are getting older and "easier" I am eager to begin volunteering at our new Hope Resource Crisis Pregnancy Center. I pray that God uses me up on this issue! I would love to bring hope to those with no hope, to be an example of how you can really make it work, and how it doesn't have to ruin your life. Just the opposite! I know my story will not be every teen mom's story, or possibility, but so many could do it if given the proper support. Without the help of our family and friends, I can't imagine how much harder it would have been having a baby so young. Just having someone to stop by and say,"Hey, you guys are doing a great job!" meant everything in those days. Having someone believe in us, trust us, and see past our ages to the fact that we loved our daughter more than anything! If God puts me in a position to do that for even ONE teen mom (or dad)... I would be forever grateful.

Defense Attorneys

This morning I watched a bit of a segment on the Today Show that featured a defense attorney for Casey Anthony - the woman accused of murdering her daughter Cailee Anthony. I only watched a small bit because I couldn't help but feel sick to my stomach over the whole ordeal. All of the evidence seems to point directly to that poor baby's mother killing her, and it's just too difficult to watch that stuff sometimes. Not to mention the sliminess of the person defending Casey.

Sometimes I wonder if the original point of defense attorneys has been lost in our Judicial System today. A defense attorney is there to make sure that you get a fair trial, that evidence is only allowed if it should be, that you have a fair shot at explaining your side. (guilty or not.)

Today, however, it seems that defense attorney's now believe it is there job to help criminals get dismissed from any wrong-doings they have done. They question law-enforcement officers in ways that are designed to trick juries, they batter and abuse children on the stand in front of their rapists and molesters in order to trip them up, they use tactics to try to make the case about anything other than the actual crime in question. Now, of course, not all defense attorneys are this way - I know that for sure, but isn't this accurate of what most of us have witnessed over the past several years?

I've seen, personally, criminals get off scott free from crimes they certainly committed due to defense attorney tactics. Where's the justice in that? How can they live with themselves knowing that they are putting drug dealers, drunk drivers, molesters, rapists, burglars, and killers right back onto the same streets in which you and I live?

Is this their job? What do you think?

When's it going to get better?

So, the economy is still stinking up America - when is it going to get better? America voted for "change," but the only changes I've seen are more foreclosures, more lay-offs, and more people trying to dump the stocks they have left - and those that used to buy them hiding in fear from the sight of them. It's scary times, people. Those of you that are watching your retirement savings dwindle down each month, I truly hurt for you. I am thankful that we are so young that hopefully we'll see a huge upswing and our retirement accounts will be fine by the time we need them.

I enjoy looking at different realty websites in our area to see what's on the market, and at what price. No, we're not looking to move anytime soon, but a girl can dream! I'm amazed at how desperate people are becoming to sell their homes. So many gorgeous homes are screaming in red letters "PRICE REDUCED FOR A FAST SELL!" I'm sad to see how many foreclosures there are right here in my little city. Part of me thinks it would be a perfect time for us to start house hunting (more land, more house - The American Dream!) but the realistic part of me knows that first we'd need to sell our house. What makes me think we'll have more luck than anyone else in this county?

The good news for us is that the crazy economy has, thankfully, not effected us. With me now working we're doing fine, and Clayton has fantastic job security so we are SO blessed not to have to pray that he's not the next to get axed by the boss.

I have been wondering how the economy has affected others. When the gas prices were sky high, we were hurting. Now that they're lower, we're feeling much more comfortable. Food prices have not exactly come down to match the lower gas prices, so we're working to make a smart list each week before we shop to combat that. How have you felt the weight of the current economic times? Has it really had much of an impact on you? What about those close to you? Have you changed spending habits at all in the past two years?

Sometimes Corporate America Gets it Right

In response to our newly inaugurated president's vision of a country that is ignited to dig back into community service, Star Bucks is launching its "I'm In" campaign. It's really a great idea, and it is so refreshing to see Big and Rich America trying to encourage positive changes in this awesome land.

The campaign is pretty simple. Go to any Star Bucks and fill out a pledge card. The pledge you are making is to perform 5 hours of community service in any volunteer manner you choose! Filling out the pledge card earns you a free tall brewed coffee... pretty sweet deal.

I'm not sure if or how they can actually track IF the people are doing their pledged community service hours, but hopefully this will spark a lot of us to look for ways to better our own communities.

Post Election Day

And the winner is.... OBAMA!

Wow, history was made last night as the first African American was selected by the folks to be our next President. I watched the numbers roll in and his electoral votes go beyond 270 with a mixed feeling of excitement and disappointment.

Excitement because of how far our country has come. Excitement because this man might truly make some needed changes - especially in regards to environmental issues and hopefully he will reform health care in a positive way. Excitement because years from now I will be able to tell my children how I remember watching the first African American President, Barrack Obama, be elected into the position. It fits right into my brain with other major events that have happened in my, life like when the Twin Towers were taken down... you will always remember seeing it, where you were, and how you felt. Watching history unfold is an amazing experience!

Disappointment because he wasn't "my" guy. Disappointment because I'm unsure of what's about to happen to our Supreme Court. Fear over what will happen with several important issues to me like abortion, gay marriage, and gun control. What is to happen in the next four years? Is it "change we can believe in" or "change to fear"? I suppose only time will tell.

Clayton and I, both a little disappointed with the new President, but optimistic because we have to trust the majority of America, decided last night that we would simply pray. Praying for our upcoming President and the people he is about to elect as his "go-to-guys" is extremely important. Praying that he selects grounded judges and not extreme left-wing crazies, that he is able to help us with health care costs without making it government run, and that he is praying.

My main prayer is that he is a true Christian man that is not only praying in front of the cameras, but in his daily life. That he is close with Christ and is led by him. Having a President that really desires to do God's will... wow! What a great country we would be!

Bail Out

It is amazing to me how just when I think the economy cannot get any worse, it does.

With huge businesses being bought out by other businesses and mortgage companies going up in smoke, I think I have come up with the perfect solution to the current economic crisis. Actually, Clayton told me he heard the solution on the news this morning... so I am just relaying what I thought to be a great idea.

The failed "bailout" proposal was going to solve the Wall Street problem by handing over $750 BILLION to the companies that have gone under to get them back on their feet. (generally...)

Am I the only one that thinks the real problem is constantly being ignored? The REAL problem is not the big companies. The REAL problem is not Wall Street. The REAL problem, my friends, is Main Street.

Everyday people like you and me stand around grumbling and complaining about the economy - pointing our fingers at Democrats or Republicans and placing the blame on everyone that we deem more financially secure than we are. Let's get real, folks. The economy is in our hands. If the stock market plummets.. it is our fault. Not Wall Streets.

This problem has been snowballing for many, many years. It starts with your average Joe seeking out the American Dream. A transvestite comedian named Eddie Izzard (he's British) defines the American Dream in one of his comedy sketches as, "Making all of the money in the world and then sticking it in your ears."

We Americans have slowly created the disaster that is in front of us today. We've purchased houses that we knew we could not afford. Why? Well, because we're Americans and it's our RIGHT to own a home! It's even more of a RIGHT to own THE home we want.. the one of our dreams!! So what if we have credit card debt up to our eye balls, student loans we cannot pay back, late fees each month from bills we currently cannot pay... we deserve it daggummit! (I'm definitely in the credit card debt situation... working our tails off to try to right that major wrong!)

So, once the war in Iraq happened and the oil companies began making RECORD profits by jacking up gas prices like no one has ever seen... those of us already in a bind became in quite the pickle. We could no longer shuffle bills.. we just simply could not pay them. Mortgage companies lost more and more money each year.. causing the big catastrophe we saw this week.

So, you see, WE are responsible for the current crisis. Seeing as how we are responsible, I think it's only fair that the Federal Government bail US out. They are willing to throw ungodly amounts of money to corporate America... but what about us little folks that actually make the world go round?

If the $750 billion was rationed out evenly amongst the American people, instead of thrown into big business, I heard an estimate that we would all get a nice sum of around $450,000. Hmm.. do you think THAT would stimulate the economy? Do you think that would turn Wall Street AND Main Street around? I sure do!

That will never happen.. only in my dreams, but it makes me a little nauseous to know that the money is apparently there to throw around.. but the folks that need it most will simply never see it. They won't offer it to us to pay for our gas for the next two years, or to pay our insurance costs and health care costs for the next one year, or to offer to pay off our mortgages so that we can free up money each month and hopefully help ourselves get out of other debts we have. Oh no... that would not make sense! Instead, we should give it to the people that are really hurting! You know, the ones that live on Wall Street.

**disclaimer: I am not a financial expert or whiz kid. I'm sure I have no idea what I am talking about and feel free to let me know how wrong I am.