A weighty issue

My weight that is. Samuel will be 2 months old tomorrow... it's really time I started doing a bit more to drop these pounds. I'd call it my "baby weight" except I'm already down to my prepregnancy weight... this is my "trying to get baby" weight. I finally forced myself to REALLY look at myself in the mirror the other day. Yikes! Who is this lady? When did my face get so full? When did I lose all definition in my arms and legs? And... I know my rear used to be up a few inches. Then again, I used to earn all of those things with healthy eating and working out almost every single day. Looking good was just a side effect of my longing to be as healthy as I could be. To run for just 5 more minutes each time, to lift just 5 more pounds today, to say no to the junk food because I knew it was toxic to my body. I used to really care what I ate and how much I moved. Now, my life seems to revolve around my children's health. I would never allow them to eat the way I allow myself to. I actually hide the junk I eat from them... I don't want them to see me eating that way and grow up thinking it's just the normal way to live. Sad isn't it? So, I write this because I hope that putting it out there for the blog world to see will help me make it. Each day I wake up feeling so confident that TODAY I'm starting over. TODAY I'm back to my old healthy and fit (and 15 pounds lighter) self. Then what happens? What are my excuses you might wonder? Well, I say them to myself enough... I'll just let you know them too!
MANDY'S UNFIT SELF'S EXCUSES
1) I'm nursing.. I'm starving... and besides... eventually he'll eat enough that I'll lose weight anyway.
***reasons this is a bad excuse - the junk is still junk.. and I shouldn't be feeding it to Samuel through my breast milk anyway.. it's still unhealthy even if I lose weight while eating it.

2) I'm so tired... it's just too hard to exercise.
***bad excuse because - if I'd make myself exercise, I wouldn't be so tired all of the time!

3) It's too hard to find time to exercise with all of these kids.
***the kids love to exercise with me, and if I'd put housework aside just 30 minutes each day instead of MYSELF, I'd have time.

4) But the PopTarts, Cokes, chocolate (of any kind...), and cookies are just too good!
***when you get diabetes like the rest of your family you won't be able to have them anyway.... stop now before you kill yourself!
*** and as Oprah has said, "This doesn't taste as good as being thin (fit) feels!" So true.. so true

So, my peeps, TONIGHT is the start of a better way of living for me. I refuse to not like my body because of the things I do to it, and I refuse to eat crap that's slowly going to either kill me (diabetes, heart attack, stroke) or seriously diminish the quality of my life just because it tastes good. I'm sure smoking and doing drugs feels great to a lot of people... but it just isn't worth it. Eating is the same thing... only more acceptable. Now, if someone would PLEASE help me convince my husband that I really can't "just not eat it" when he brings treats into the house? If I could keep him away from WalMart... I'd be 20 pounds lighter I think... (excuse #5?)